Kallisari got up the next morning because Steelplate insisted on nuzzling
her until she moved. Every line of her body drooped with sadness and hurt as
she put her hat on and checked it in the mirror. For the first time ever, the
sight of it perched securely on her head failed to make her feel better. It
only brought home more painfully what she had paid to get it. Her original desire
for revenge seemed petty now, compared to the trap that she had fallen into.
Being hopelessly and helplessly in love with the one who had hurt you so badly
was far worse than the original hurt had been.
She tucked a happily wriggling Steelplate under her arm and carried him downstairs
to his owner. Blchocobo was in the kitchen, mixing up a new dish. Kallisari
grabbed some leftover omelette out of the refrigerator and gave Steelplate a
few crumbs before she dropped him on the floor beside his master.
"Here's Steelplate back, blchocobo. Thanks for letting him stay with me for
the night. It was... kind of you."
Blchocobo didn't look around as he continued to wash up the organic broccoli
he was working with. "You're welcome," came his calm tones. "Are you feeling
any better this morning?"
"Not much." Kallisari flopped down in a chair and leaned her head on her hooves
in total dejection. "I guess you think I'm crazy to run out of the room screaming
over nothing like that."
"No, not really. MonoKeras couldn't understand it at first, but we talked
about it and finally figured out what it must be."
"Why didn't he tell me?" Kallisari said bitterly. "Why did I have to fall
in love with him, and why did I ever think he was any good after what he did
to me?"
"Life is strange that way." Blchocobo laid the broccoli aside and got out
some sauerkraut. Putting a colander over the sink's drain, he began to thoroughly
squeeze the juice out of it.
Kallisari broke the silence. "What I don't get is how a yellow female Kiko
can be the same person as a golden male Uni. How did he manage that?"
"You've never heard of the lab ray, have you"
"Umm... I think he mentioned it a few times, but he never did explain anything
about it."
"He wouldn't. MonoKeras went through a lot with that thing. The lab ray is
in a secret location, and it's run by a mad scientist. He zaps you with the
ray and it changes you."
"Changes you into what?"
"Anything. It can make you slower or faster, stronger or weaker, healthier
or sicker, and can change your colour, your species, even your sex."
Kallisari shuddered. "How would you even know what you were after all that?"
"I don't know. I don't think MonoKeras knows, either."
"But... why? I mean, why go through all that?"
"Because, over time, it tends to make you better. You get stronger and faster.
That's why MonoKeras is so much faster than we are."
"Oh." Silence fell again. Kallisari watched blchocobo get out some veggie
sausages and start slicing them. "So he got changed."
"Many times. He was a Kiko when he met you."
"I suppose that's the excuse he uses for treating me so rotten," Kallisari
said bitterly. "The Lab Ray changed him, so that's why he did all that stuff."
"MonoKeras has done things he's ashamed of. He's done things I'm ashamed of.
But you have to press him to get him to admit it. He doesn't like to talk about
it."
"Surprise." Kallisari's sarcastic comment seemed to put an end to the conversation.
Blchocobo was stirring the sausage pieces into the sauerkraut when he asked,
"So, do you still want to marry him?" "I..." Kallisari's throat closed on itself.
"I don't know," she finally admitted.
"In other words, you want to say no, but you're afraid the answer is yes."
"I guess..... I don't get it! How can you hate someone, find them totally
irritating, and still love them??"
"Love is that way, apparently. Just about everyone finds it out, but no one
really understands why." More silence. Blchocobo carefully poured some white
sauce on top of his dish before putting it in the microwave, then began cutting
the broccoli pieces off their stalks. "He cried, you know."
"Huh?"
"MonoKeras was crying when he realised what he'd done to you."
"Oh. Did he ever realise what he'd done wrong?"
Blchocobo shrugged. "What do you think he did wrong?"
Kallisari's feelings finally found some vent. "Everything! First he practically
kills me by hitting me on top of the head for days on end. Then, when he sees
I'm so in love with him I can't think straight, he shamelessly takes advantage
of me! I mean, look at all the stuff I did for him! Do you realise how much
I spent- on chocolates alone- just to feed his ego? The nerve!"
"Yes. He treated you badly, and in return you devoted your life to him. Hardly
a fair trade, was it."
"Hardly!"
"Do you know what he finally told me?"
"I don't want to hear it!"
Blchocobo ignored her protest. "He said, 'I should have stuck with hitting
her over the head. It would have been easier on both of us.'"
Silence. Blchocobo retrieved his dish from the microwave and sprinkled the
broccoli pieces on top before turning around to put it in the refrigerator.
"I guess he..." he said before he looked and realised his audience was gone.
A timid knocking sounded on the door to MonoKeras' workroom. An unintelligible
grunt from inside was followed by the sound of the door as Kallisari entered
the room. "Hello."
MonoKeras looked up from his magical contraption, eyes bleary and red from
lack of sleep. "Oh. Hi."
"What are you doing?"
"The one thing I'm not supposed to do. What else?"
"Oh. What's that?"
"Tell your own fortune with magic."
Despite herself, Kallisari was fascinated. "How do you do that?"
MonoKeras' shoulders slumped. "I've spent all night on it and I still don't
know. The problem is feedback. Whenever you think you've got a clear picture,
what you intend to do changes and that changes the picture and...."
"Stop! I'll just take your word for it."
MonoKeras snorted softly. "Take my word? That seems to be a pretty dangerous
thing around here."
"Could.... could you tell my fortune?"
"Maybe. It'd be a lot easier."
"Try?"
MonoKeras shrugged slightly in resignation. "OK. Just sit down there." Kallisari
sat opposite him at his workbench and watched intently as MonoKeras' cage of
funny looking rods and wires began to hum and spit with magical energy. After
a minute or so of humming, the wires stopped vibrating and MonoKeras sighed.
"I can't do it."
"Why not?"
He refused to meet her gaze. "Same reason. We're tied together too closely.
Anything I see for you, my own intentions change it and it's almost as bad as
my own."
"Oh. Does that mean you love me?"
MonoKeras sat up abruptly before getting up altogether and pacing over to the
one window. "Light above help me. I guess I do."
"Is that a bad thing?"
"Yeah. For you!" He turned around and for the first time, Kallisari saw him
in pure misery. "Look, Kalli, don't you see? You're the naive young girl from
the wild, and you fall for me. And instead of trying to... oh, I don't know....
well....."
"You decided to enjoy the attention, rather than question it."
"Yeah. I mean, I'm sure it was sincere and all that, but... it wasn't worth
it. It really wasn't. And now I don't know what to do. For the first time in
my life, I find myself wanting something, but I don't think I deserve it!"
"Uh huh. Maybe you don't."
"Yeah. Kalli, is it possible, could you... would you..."
"Marry you?"
"....Forgive me?"
Despite her expectations, Kallisari was taken aback. She choked. When she could
speak again, she finally found the words to say. "I would say for what, but
I think we know. I got back at you for hitting me earlier, so it can't be that.
And you're not the type to stop and think about what you're doing first, so
we both know how we got into our current mess. I know you're sorry, but I would
have still said no if you had tried to say 'marry'. But 'forgive'? I'm sure
I can manage that."
MonoKeras slumped with relief. "Thanks. I don't deserve it, I know, but still,
thanks."
The tension left the room as MonoKeras sat back down on the other side of the
table. They found themselves both staring into space, trying to avoid each others'
eyes, and then giggled at the silliness of it. Suddenly, a new wave of guilt
washed over Kallisari. "Oh no!"
"What's wrong?"
"What if, well that is... I just realised I'm not exactly innocent, either."
"What do you mean? I'm the one that...."
"No, not now, I mean then. I got my Halloween paintbrush by getting it from
Edna."
"Edna? That hag?"
"Yeah. And she cursed me to marry my worst enemy!"
MonoKeras shuddered. "No wonder you fell in love with me. Talk about doomed!"
"Yeah, so... is this real? Or did I doom both of us because I wanted revenge?"
"Curses!"
Kallisari giggled. "Did I just hear you swear?"
"Uh? No, no, just thinking. Curses are magic, and that's sort of my stock
in trade. Hummm let me think about this."
"OK. Just don't take too long, because I don't want to wait and... well try
to be objective about it... if you can?"
MonoKeras laughed. "I'll have to be! I don't dare be otherwise!"
He immediately began changing his magical instruments around on his workbench.
After a while, he re-energised his new creation and a ball of green fire came
into being in the air above it. Slowly, it began to lengthen and grow spikes.
The first one went to Kallisari, who flinched but then relaxed when she realised
it didn't hurt. The second headed towards MonoKeras, but it seemed to hesitate
a bit. Then a third flowed out and seemed to vanish in space, pointing roughly
east. Several other small spikes formed on the ball, but none seemed to do much
more than writhe. MonoKeras sighed and let it go.
"OK, I think I can give you something of an answer."
"OK?"
"First, realise that all curses are designed to make the cursed being miserable."
"I found that out."
"Right. So, the key is to make you marry someone you hate. That's why it has
to be your worst enemy. I was your worst enemy at the time, so it worked to
bring us together. If we had never found out about our past, it would have propelled
us to marry. But now that we know, it's beginning to change. Right now, it still
is focused mostly on me as your enemy, but it's starting to shift to another.
I couldn't tell for sure, but I think it's another Kiko I don't know why."
Kallisari's mind flipped back to the pound. "I think I do. So is there some
way to turn it off?"
"Well, a simple spell, combined with your being repainted some other colour
would be enough to remove it."
Kallisari instinctively clung to her hat. "I... isn't there some other way?
I like being a Halloween Peophin."
"I think so. It's a continuing effort, though, and it can't be finished until
we marry, but I think it can be... "
"Removed?"
"More like reversed. But that's only if we get married."
Kallisari laughed. "MonoKeras, that has got to be the worst marriage proposal
I've heard yet. 'Marry me or wind up doomed again.'"
MonoKeras blinked, then grinned shamefacedly. "You're right. I hadn't thought
about it that way. This objective thinking thing can be carried too far sometimes,
can't it."
"Well umm... I'm willing if you are."
MonoKeras raised an eyebrow. "Was that a yes?"
"Was that a proposal?" Kallisari encountered.
They both held a straight face for only a matter of seconds before collapsing
into each other's arms in laughter. One of MonoKeras' potions got knocked off
his workbench and broke on the floor. It ate a hole through the floor while
the occupants of the room were too busy enjoying the moment to notice.
"Hmmm...." Blchocobo looked up at the new hole in the kitchen ceiling. Above
it, the sight of what he saw confirmed the general sounds he'd been hearing
for some time. "Steelplate," he said to his Anubis, "I think they're going to
be all right."
And so they were. MonoKeras and Kallisari waited for the specified time. It
was on MonoKeras' first birthday that they were married.
"Just think," blchocobo snickered at the wedding. "Now you won't forget your
anniversary MonoKeras, it's always the same as your birthday."
MonoKeras bared his teeth in a mock snarl. "Quit revealing trade secrets, brother,"
he growled. As Kallisari giggled, he turned back to her. "Don't listen to him,
darling, or he'll get you in trouble."
Kallisari's giggle turned into a full-throated laugh. Remembering the conversation
she'd had that fateful morning with blchocobo, she replied, "You're lucky I
did listen to him, or you wouldn't be with me today!"
MonoKeras looked puzzled, but she refused to elaborate. Let him figure it out
on his own, she decided. She grinned at blchocobo. His expressionless mask stared
back at her, but then one eye closed in a slow but definite wink.
The End
With sincere thanks to kewl_fox
of "Kewl Thought" comics for showing me the Halloween Peophin, and to
Specksilver
for giving me Kallisari. | 
