Zm Rmgervd Drgs Gsv KACHEEKERS Ywh (An Interview With the KACHEEKERS' Guy)

by somhrita

My Kacheek and I (Snookum_2000) love to go exploring and one day as we were exploring Tyrannia, a very strange thing happened... we had an encounter with what looked like one of the Kacheekers. My pet somehow knew how to converse in Tyrannian language.... It was very interesting and so I thought I should let my fellow Neofriends know all about it. He was very polite and helpful. At first I thought he would do something horrible to me he made weird sounds. But those weren't sounds, they were "Hi!"s and "hello!"s . So... here we go. (WHEEEEEE!!!!)

Me: Hello, Mr. Kacheeker! (That's what he happened to be!)

Snookum_2000 (translator): Svool, Ni. Kacheeker.

Mr. Kacheeker: Sr!! (shaking his hands vigorously, which made me and Snookum_2000 go up and down. Man, but was he strong.)

Snookum_2000(translator): He says "hi!"

Me: Well, so how is it here in the Tyrannia?

Snookum_2000 (u know what she is.): Hl, sld rh rg rm gs Tyrannia?

Mr. Kacheeker: Rg rh z evib mrxv kosxv, ufg zohl evib wzmtvilfh.

Snookum_2000: He says that it actually is a very nice place, but also very dangerous. (Gets alarmed )

Me: In what way is it dangerous? Are there any criminal acts?

Snookum_2000: Rm dszg dzb rh rg wzmtvilf? Ziv gsviv nmb xirnrmzo zxgh?

Me: In what way is it dangerous? Are there any criminal acts?

Snookum_2000: Rm dszg dzb rh rg wzmtvilf? Ziv gsviv nmb xirnrmzo zxgh?

Mr. Kacheeker: (Growls threateningly) Dsb gsv hvoo ziv blf zhprms nv hl nzmb gsrmth?

Snookum_2000: (Steps back) Uh - oh! I think he is getting angry on us! (isn't he helpful :( ! )

Me: Why? What's wrong?

Snookum_2000: He wants to know why there's so much questioning going on. (Hides behind me.)

Me: Don't be a scaredy-cat cat. Oh! Sorry, don't be a scaredy-cat Kacheek! Tell him, we are curious about this whole place and want to be friends with him.

Snookum_2000: Dv dzmg gl wv blfi uirvmw... qfhg xfvrlfh. (smiles sweetly)

Mr. Kacheeker: (Shakes his head, looks up and smiles. Weird aren't they?!) Hlvvb! Gsvie zmb xirnrmzo zxgh, yfh, gsvie zmb nzmy wzmtrilfh xivzgfivh.

Snookum_2000: (stops yawning as I give him a glare) Oh! He says there aren't any criminal acts, but dangerous creatures are there in the jungle, I guess.

Me: Hmmm. What do you do to pass your time?

Snookum_2000: (looks awfully interested) Dszg wl blf wl GL kzhh blfi grnv?

Mr. Kacheeker: (after an uproarious fit of laughter) Fh Tyrannians gzrv zxgrev kzig rm gsv ezirlfh tznvh blf hvv, dv ziv gsv lmvs dsl xlliwrmzgv zoo gsrh. R olev GL kozb "Switch-A-Roo"!! (starts jumping up and down. Holy Kau!)

Me: So what songs do you know?

Snookum_2000:Hl dszg hlmth wl blf pmld?

Snookum_2000: What?? He doesn't know what songs are! (surprised)

Me: Jumping Jerusalem! Good gracious! What kind of people are they? ( I didn't realize that Mr. Kacheek was watching the way I was speaking and so when I noticed, I stopped immediately.)

Snookum_2000: Mvevi nrmy.

Mr. Kacheek: (laughs mischievously) lpzb!

Me: What did you just tell him? (I smelled a rat, and I know when I smell a rat because I am experienced in smelling rats.)

Snookum_2000: (laughs) I told him 'never mind'! Hee hee!

Me: (grimacing) Hahaha! I forgot to laugh.

Snookum_2000: What next?

Me: Could you please show us your cultural activities and habitats?

Snookum_2000: Xlfow blf kovshv hsld fh blfi xfogfizo zxgrergrvh zmw szyrgzgh? (jumps up and down like a basketball)

Kacheeker: (Stands up and grabs our hands dragging us into what looked like a whole world of stones)

We looked around and it felt like we were living with the Flintstones. I mean what we saw was a stone palace. They had a Chomby named Doofus for pet and their was a dung bath tub and a dung box. There were stone drawers, a stone television. The stone television was their latest advancement. Before it there came the stone refrigerator. We saw something we asked him about and got the weirdest of answers.

Me: (Tugging Snookum_2000 to get hiss attention from the television) Do you see that Elephante trunk?

Snookum_2000: I do!!!

Me: Ask him why it's there?

Snookum_2000: (claps her hands to get Mr. Kacheeker's attention) Dsb wl blf pvvk zm vovkszmg?

Mr. Kacheeker: (This one had a long answer so I thought to put it in English after Snookum_2000 told me what he meant. Here it goes!) He is a two-in-one creature. He does all the pouring and blowing. When the climate is hot he sprinkles cold water all over from the lake inside the jungle. When it cold he runs up to the volcano and sprinkles lava into the room to keep us warm and cozy. He uses his trunk to blow out all the dirt in our house and then sucks them all up and blows it out into the jungle. He also fills the dung bathtub! But we can afford all this as we are the richest of all Kacheekers.

Me: Wow!

Snookum_2000: Yeah!!

Me: I am thirsty!

I didn't have to wait to return. Mr. Kacheeker made me sit in his dung sofa . Ewwwwww. And offered me some tea! I didn't know they could cook all this! After that he drove us out. All because of my NeoPet's BIG mouth. She said "What the heck is this? Lava in a cup" in Tyrannian. I will tell you what happened after that.

Mr. Kacheeker: HRFgfjvn duheue dwuiz9wie hd8che8cr8ucnudhcghtu irmc49m hdhcidnbd djisnd I d9j .

He was shouting all sorts of what was rubbish to me. I ran out with my NeoPet immediately.

P.S. I cannot guarantee you whether any of this is real. I just know I am for real and so is Snookum_2000.