There are ants in my Lucky Green Boots Circulation: 178,575,454 Issue: 435 | 19th day of Running, Y12
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What Jhudora Doesn't Want You To Know: By llusen


by fancifully

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Greetings, my fellow Neopians!

It’s Illusen here, writing to you from the leafy treetops of my glade in Meridell. As we all know, today is my special day. It is a day when all of Neopia celebrates the many wonderful qualities that make me such a revered and loved faerie, and is generally filled with fun and festivities for all – except for one very notable absentee. Every year on this day, my arch nemesis, Jhudora, retreats behind the swirling purple clouds that shroud her in secrecy and waits bitterly for the day to end and ‘normality’ to resume. She simply can’t stand it when I’m in the limelight – she’s always been a bit of an attention seeker, as I’m sure all of you wise Neopians are already aware.

I like to think that I, being the better faerie, have always handled Jhudora Day with grace and good humour. Yet it seems that she simply cannot bring herself to do the same for me on my special day. Her bitterness and jealousy really put a dampener on the occasion. And you know what? It really does hurt my feelings.

So this year I’ve decided that I’m going to get up to a little bit of mischief myself! Nothing too bad, of course – I’m the good faerie here, after all. But it is my day, and if you can’t have some fun on your own celebratory day, when can you? So, without further ado, I present to you good Neopians the following list of the Top 8 Things that Jhudora would absolutely hate for all of Neopia to know. Oh, I’m so bad.

Number 8:

Jhudora has a crippling fear of birds. Any shape, any size – even the most harmless baby Pteri is enough to reduce her to a quivering mess. Have you ever wondered why her castle is so heavily protected? Although she wants you to think that it’s because she has many extraordinarily powerful and valuable artefacts that require protection, it’s actually so that no birds can get in! I have no idea when this fear started, although it may have been when we were younger, and a Pterodactyl swooped her in Tyrannia..

Number 7:

Jhudora’s favourite colour actually isn’t purple. I know, I know, you’d think that it would be, what with her purple hair, purple castle and purple cloud... but no. Jhudora’s favourite colour is actually green! She can’t stand the fact that I, being an earth faerie, received the privilege of wearing green and she did not. However, being the sneaky wretch that she is, she still tries to incorporate green into her image wherever she can – those green smoke plumes surrounding her castle and that green streak in her hair aren’t just for show, you know.

Number 6:

You might think that, being a dark faerie, Jhudora’s favourite snack would be something sinister and exotic, like Dark Faerie Gelato. However, that is not the case. Jhudora’s absolute favourite treat, unbelievable as it may seem, is Fun and Happytime Gum. She just can’t get enough of it! And now that I’ve let her culinary secret out of the bag, I’ll never feel safe eating again – Jhudora has a way with sneaking essence of poisonous lollypop into the most innocent looking of foods!

Number 5:

Jhudora’s personal Bartamus is named Fluffy. Don’t ask me why, because even I honestly can’t fathom this one. It certainly can’t be because of his sweet and cuddly looks!

Number 4:

Jhudora hates living up high in the clouds of Faerieland. This may be related to her fear of birds, but she would much prefer to have her dwelling firmly on the ground than floating precariously on a bed of wispy clouds and smoke. To be honest, I think she’d prefer living in a Tyrannian cave than the Faerieland skies – although she’d have to watch out for those Pterodactyls!

Number 3:

One of Jhudora’s favourite places in all of Neopia is the Rainbow Fountain. She just loves sitting there and staring at the pretty colours splashing by – although she’d never admit this! If you asked her why she was there, she’d most likely haughtily declare that she was just there to laugh at the pitifully ugly Neopets who feel that they need to use the magical waters to make themselves more beautiful (never mind that Jhudora would secretly love a dip in the fountain herself!).

Number 2:

Jhudora’s name was originally spelt ‘Judora’ – without the ‘h’. However, she simply couldn’t allow her name to have fewer letters than mine – that might imply that she was somehow inferior to me (go figure, right?) So, she added the ‘h’ and destroyed all references to the previous spelling of her name, and nobody was ever the wiser... until now. Muhaha, I feel so naughty!

Number 1:

So, here we are. We’ve arrived at the number one secret that Jhudora would absolutely despise me for revealing. Not that she doesn’t despise me already of course, but you know what I mean. Every year on Christmas Eve, Jhudora secretly descends from her Cloud and leaves gifts for the poorest faeries in Neopia. I don’t know why she does this, and the faeries certainly have no idea that it’s Jhudora who leaves those presents for them. But I think that her secret gift-giving proves that underneath her tough and menacing exterior, Jhudora does, in fact, have a heart. Or she could have just gotten sick of all those quest items piling up inside her home and needed to find a way to get rid of them. But either way, don’t tell anyone that I told you!

Well, that’s about all of the juicy secrets that I have to reveal for you today. I’ve written 1,000 words on Jhudora already, and I think that’s quite enough for now! Today is meant to be about me, after all. But who knows, maybe next year I’ll get around to revealing some more of Jhudora’s hidden secrets...

Until then, best wishes for a happy and peaceful year!

Illusen xoxo

 
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