A Sloth Fan's Sloth Themed April Fools Pranks

     Therefore, I invite you today to read along with some of my most amazing ideas, snippets of inspiration, and opinions on how I think the great Doctor would look upon these shenanigans. Maybe you could use some of these, with twists and adaptations of course, in your own pranks this year!?

     Now, for these to be pranks worthy of our almighty and dear Doctor Frank Sloth, they will need to be extremely clever, cause the most chaos possible, and be considered a great risk to all involved. You might need some minions of your own who are in-the-know to help you too. So, gather your followers, your computer and craft equipment, and buckle in.

          Mind Control Announcements

     Simple. Take over your school’s (or I guess your workplace’s?) PA system and announce in a deep, ominous voice:

     “This is the commander of the Doctor Frank Sloth troops. Mind control is now activated. Please scream I love Doctor Sloth at the top of your lungs and await further orders - or else.”

     Even better than just sneaking in on the day and trying to co-opt the microphone, is if you can do it with some sort of pre-recorded practiced and plotted version and completely cover your tracks so that there is no way they can tell it’s you. Get that message out in the sneakiest way you can and play along when everyone starts to cower in fear. You never know, this might be exactly what Sloth is actually planning to do any day now. So best to be prepared, right!?

     You may, in fact, find that you are inspired to use a variety of messages to get increasingly funnier or more extreme results. Remember: it is important to include the “please” though, otherwise people might not want to do it, or worse, they might think our space overlord is impolite. You wouldn’t want to be responsible for that. A key element of space domination is, after all, courtesy.

          The Transmogrification Potion in the Water Supply

     Yes. You read that correctly. If what I've read out there on the Neoboards is true, a diluted Transmogrification process is one of those unpredictable but temporary and ultimately harmless pranks that might cause an unpleasant protuberance or smell but that will wear off before the day of pranks is through. You might need to befriend the caretaker for this, or set up an almighty distraction… maybe release some Warfs in the cafeteria?

     Whatever you do, you'll need to get that step of the plan underway before the first break of the day, or ideally right before lunch when everyone is most likely to need to both wash their hands and slake their thirst. Ohhhh I just had an inspired thought (right as I’m writing this!) maybe you could get the potion into a swimming pool so that everyone who goes for a paddle in that lesson gets an impromptu and alternative Fountain Dip. Who doesn't want an extra ear or eye for April Fools Day?

     This has an added benefit. Some of your fellow classmates (or workmates) might actually enjoy this new and updated look, and decide of their own volition to do the most logical thing to do when you appreciate the mutant aesthetic: Join the space fleet of Doctor Frank Sloth and aid him in his bid for absolute world domination.

     That or buy a halloween costume. It’s up to you.

          Mutant Snack Swap

     This one you might have to do at home, or really really befriend the lunch staff. Replace normal lunch food options with some Sloth Salad, Sloth Spaghetti. Maybe some Cherry Sloth Yogurt for dessert? The opportunities are absolutely endless. Well, technically they do have a very definite end but you get my meaning. Explore the possibilities and introduce Sloth into every meal.

     Not only will everyone be shocked, they will also be absolutely delighted by such fine dining picks. Or, at least, the most discerning of them will. This will also help you pick out those who are either disgusted or loyal to Sloth’s aesthetic too.

     I ask you, dear readers, what is the true meaning of a prank? The essence of April Fools? That’s right. First and foremost, you aim to inspire others. That is the true, original meaning of this auspicious day.

     That being said, don’t look that fact up or think too hard about it if you don’t mind. Not that I would lie or ever be inaccurate. But, ask yourself this: would Dr. Sloth be proud? Absolutely. Would you avoid detention? Maybe. Would you earn the respect of all your peers? Well, no, maybe not. But Cherry Sloth Yogurt is very tasty so there is that.

     And this is, unfortunately, all the pranks that I dare to share with you all today. I had many more ideas for you all, of course, but had to scrap them for very unfortunate reasons like “ethics”, “risk of bodily harm”, and more surprisingly “laws against stock market manipulation”.

     Yeah, that one was shocking to me too but my Mum got a very stern phone call and gave me an even more stern talking to than even I anticipated.

     Putting that aside for a moment, nothing carries the essence of Doctor Sloth than spreading mayhem, albeit in a very modest way. Divide and conquer, as they say - bring a little slice of chaos to those around you, and contribute to Doctor Sloth’s sights on world domination. While the link between childish pranks and eventual Neopian domination might not be immediately obvious, I’m certain I’ll figure it out eventually.

     Not yet though.

     I hope that your humble writer has once again managed to bring lovely ideas to all of you in a timely manner. I, for one, am looking forward to April Fools Day. I wish to hear the echoes of all the assuredly successful Sloth themed pranks that I have doubtless given you the ideas of. Like a famous author once said, writing is a garden, the readers’ minds are the soil, the words are the seed, and the items in the article lists are the fertilizer, and also the conclusion is kind of like adequate sunshine. Maybe the introduction is the fertilizer?

     Does that make sense?

     It made sense, right?

     Happy April Fools, dear readers.

     This has been, once again, HubridNoxFan127, signing off.

     Just kidding.

     ;-)