What to Do and Not Do in Eliv Thade's Castle

Everyone got along and worked in peace and harmony to serve their king, Eliv Thade.

Eliv Thade had a special talent; he was exceptionally good at riddles.

Every riddle that he was given he could solve almost instantly, Anagrams were his favourite type of riddles.

Eliv Thade’s servants delighted in giving a riddle to solve, whether it is an anagram or something more difficult, each time he was able to solve it.

Then one day, one of his servants gave him a riddle that he could not solve.

The servant pestered him everyday, “Got the answer yet?” he would ask.

Eventually the tormented Kacheek descended into madness, the Castle fell into disrepair. His servants left, fearing for their own safety, and a few years later Eliv Thade dropped off his mortal coil.

However, his spirit still walks the corridors of his Castle, tormenting the poor pets that are foolish enough to enter the Castle of Eliv Thade.

But there are still some questions that are left answered, such as what exactly the riddle was and what you should do should you find yourself in Eliv Thade’s Castle.

The riddle is obvious so I’m sure you will work that out for yourself, but as to what you should do if you accidentally stumble into the mad Kacheek’s castle is not as obvious, so read on, brave reader, and you will find the Top Five Things You Should Do and Not Do if You Find Yourself Trapped in Eliv Thade’s Castle.

DO NOT

Here are the top 10 things you should not do:

5. Panic

Don’t panic, there’s no reason to; after all, you’re only stuck in a Castle with a mad Kacheek that will take great delight in throwing you in the basement. Why panic?

4. Yell and Scream

Eliv Thade doesn’t like yelling or loud noises, so keep your voice down. However, he is very hard of hearing, so if he decided to ask you a riddle and you know the answer, chances are you will have to yell so he hears you, then because you made too much noise he will most probably throw you in the Basement. The perfect example of a ‘lose, lose’ situation.

3. Run

If there is one think this mad Kacheek hates it’s people running in his house. Running causes accidents and you may knock over his bookcases, or break one of his priced vases. If you do knock over one his book cases or break one of his vases then I suggest you run because he will throw you in the basement anyway.

2. Try to Enter the Crypt

He doesn’t like people entering the Crypt so avoid that room altogether, instead walk (and I mean WALK, DO NOT RUN) in the other direction as far away from the crypt as possible.

1. Try to Escape

He’s been lonely for millions of years, do you really think he will want you to escape?

Of course not, once you’re in his castle, you stay there. It’ll be fun, a mad Kacheek for company and Vernax webs for food, what’s not to like about living in Thade’s Castle?

Well, now that you know what you shouldn’t do, this is what you should do:

5. Panic

You are locked in a Castle with a mad Kacheek, panic as much as you can. It’ll help you think, well it won’t, but that’s not the point.

4. Yell and Scream

Eliv Thade doesn’t like loud noises, so make as much noise as possible to try and scare him off. If you have a ‘Trumpet of Deafening’ handy, give it a blow and see how much you can torment that tormenting Kacheek.

3. Run

If you are being chased by a mad Kacheek, you don’t walk, you run as fast as you can. Try to get away; he’s quite slow in his old age so it shouldn’t be that hard to get away from him.

2. Try to Enter the Crypt

Collect the magical artefacts used to get rid of Thade, such as the Amulet of Thilg, Sword of Skardsen, Shield of Pion Troect and the Grimoire of Thade, then go to the Crpyt, go directly to the Crypt, do not pass Eliv Thade and do not get thrown in the basement.

1. Try to Escape

It may be hard, but it’s worth it, unless you want a mad Kacheek for company and webs of Vernax for food. There are many ways to escape, such as entering the Crypt, breaking down the door, getting thrown in the basement and leaving through the secret exit, asking Eliv Thade nicely to let you go and even by tapping your heels together three times while saying “There’s no place like the Snowager’s cave.”

Although that last way has resulted in many being… erm… eaten… and as much I would like to right a guide on how to escape from the Snowager's cave, I’m still trying to find how to escape from there myself.

Basically if you want to get out of Thade’s castle, it's up to you; if you want to stay there and keep the poor Kacheek company, then go for it. I’m sure no one will stop you. The basement isn’t that bad, it’s full of cool looking shiny things and rare items. And when you think about the alternative to being in the castle, being out of the castle… with all those creepy baby and faerie pets, it’s not that bad.

You never know, if you stay in the Castle long enough you may get a nice looking trophy out of it.

So now, brave reader, you know how to get out of Thade’s castle. And you also know how to stay in Thade’s castle.

So are you brave enough to enter the Castle of Eliv Thade? Or should that question be 'Are you crazy enough to enter the Castle of Eliv Thade?'

Doog Kcul!