 How I Celebrated Neo’s 23rd Birthday
by ghostie_of_the_fc
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In celebration of Neopets’ 23rd birthday, I thought it fitting to accomplish one of my goals from the early years. I wanted to accomplish a first I’d been waiting to reach for over 20 years - it was time for me to finally take home the coveted Dice-a-Roo jackpot. I had long yearned for the fame, the riches, and the avatar that accompanied the accomplishment, but in all my time here I’d never even made it past the fourth dice. Armed with the necessary entrance fee for long-haul rolling, I headed off to Roo Island to meet my destiny. HOUR ONE King Roo ushers me in excitedly. He’s been playing this game for two decades and hasn’t seemed to tire of it. “I’ve been playing this game for two decades,” he says, “and I’m still not tired of it!” I nod politely and hand him 5 Neopoints. I take the dice in one hand, subtly touch the Fake Lucky Cybunny Foot in my front pocket, and let it roll. Skull. Undeterred, I place 5 more Neopoints in front of His Majesty. I roll the dice and meet the gaze of another red skull. This happens five more times, and even King Roo beings to look uncomfortable. I knew the Cybunny foot was fake, but it only now occurred to me that the promised luck was synthesized as well. I put it to the side and opt to go forward alone. HOUR TWO After a fair few false starts, I finally see some progress. I manage to move to the blue die, and another successful roll helps me move on to green. Maybe the Cybunny foot just needed to be positioned in a westward fashion. The next few rolls of the next round result in me losing Neopoints. The king assures me several times that my pot cannot fall below zero. “No matter how hard you try,” he adds dryly. I’m finally met with a new symbol - a gift box wrapped neatly with a purple bow. The king hands me several turkey slices. They are not in any packaging. I pocket them hesitantly. A mystic wind blows past, though I start to suspect it’s nothing but King Roo’s increasingly loud sighs. I roll a skull and start anew. This time, I stick to the green die for considerably longer than usual. After several rounds, my pockets are filled to the brim with questionable cuisine. The king hands me yet another bitten apple, and I start to wonder if he’s trying to get me to leave. I win several Dirt Pies and my suspicions grow. HOUR THREE Another hour has passed. I have rolled six arrows in a row, and been told I was “so close” six times as well. I haven’t seen a blue die in over thirty minutes. I can no longer remember the names of my loved ones. All I know is Dice-a-Roo. King Roo is my family now. A mystic wind blows past, and I feel different somehow - I take this to be a good sign. My optimism is quickly rewarded when I effortlessly reach the yellow die. I am handed several lottery tickets and am surprised to find they are for today’s drawing. I can feel my excitement rising after receiving a fourth lottery ticket, and a small part of me begins to wonder if this is my lucky round. I clasp the dice in my hands and let it rip. I lose. HOUR FOUR After several hours it has finally happened. For the first time in my Neopian life, I catch a glimpse of the silver die. I do my best to temper my expectations, but after several rolls my pot has grown exponentially. Even King Roo looks somewhat excited by my progress, leaning forward and watching expectantly each time I roll. Another win, another win, a small setback, another win - I’m on fire. I roll a question mark and hold out my hand, eager for my free lottery ticket. Instead I am robbed by the Pant Devil, who takes my coveted unwrapped turkey slices. I try to hide my shock and play it cool - this is fine - but my hands tremble as I retrieve the die. I give it another roll and watch helplessly as it tumbles, teeters, and falls into its final resting place. The skull meets my eyes, and I age a thousand years in one mere moment. HOUR FIVE I approach the card table gleefully and ask the Aisha if I can play a round. “Neopets is 23 this year,” I mention, watching as my cards are dealt. “I think it’s finally time I get my Pyramids trophy.” HOUR SIX Pyramids is not a fun game. I greet the Chomby at the Solitaire table politely and pay the fee. The Sakhmet Solitaire Bonus trophy looks better anyway. HOUR SEVEN I’ve always wanted to win the Scorchy Slots, or have a wish granted by the aptly titled Wishing Well. Neither event happens. HOUR EIGHT I’m disappointed by the results of my day. I wanted to celebrate this monumental birthday in style, with a monumental first, and as the hours wound down I felt like a failure. There were no new avatars, no new riches, and no shiny trophies to mark the occasion. I sat on a bench in Neopia Central and sighed as midnight approached. As the day came to a close, a sudden realization dawned on me. Maybe it wasn’t such a bad thing to have so much left to do. After 23 years, there were still a number of accomplishments left on my to-do list. What fun would life in Neopia be if there was nothing left to do? While I didn’t have some trinket to look back on, but I had a lot more to which I could look forward. There were still worlds to explore, games to play, prizes to win, and trophies to acquire. I could look forward to future birthdays and whatever firsts the years might bring. Plus, if I couldn’t have a first, I could at least have a last, and I was never going back to Roo Island.
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