Treats, Not Tricks: Yay or Nay by o_apollo_o
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Halloween: n) a holiday in Neopia; either scares the dung right out of you or
has you hyper and ready for candy.
For me, it’s the second one. You? I sure hope it’s the second one. I mean,
who’s scared of Halloween? There are a bunch of pets running around like “Gallery
of Evil” wannabes or in preppy faerie costumes. Are those scary? I think not!
Actually, I don’t think much at all, but that’s beside the point.
Those pets in costumes go trick-or-treating and get tons and tons of candy.
This Neopian Times writer has been through quite a few vandalistic, I mean,
candyful Halloweens and can teach you about all of the candies that are handed
out.
The study of Halloween candies is considered a science, or at least it is to
me. Much too complicated for the average owner/pet/petpet/petpetpet, and being
the generous, wonderful, and downright handsome writer that I am, I will decide
to share my knowledge with everyone in the latest edition of the Neopian Times.
Sorted in this super spiffy sweet “Yay or Nay” guide, you can know which candies
to toss, let rot, and shove in your mouth. Please note that this guide is not
rated by taste; that is just unfair. Taste is different for everyone, so instead
it is yayed or nayed by trick-or-treating convenience.
Lollypops…
Whether it be in the shape of a pet, petpet, or just a plain circle, lollypops
are delicious and come in a wide variety for everyone. Unfortunately, Neopian
lollypops are known for not having a plastic covering and will often get a sticky
residue on your other treats.
…Nay!
Pet Chocolate Treats…
Neopia is widely known for producing chocolate treats in the image of the many
varieties of pets inhabiting its world. Made from either white, milk, mint,
dark or even rare orange chocolate, these treats are a classic, but not made
for Halloween. Melting and getting all over other sweets, similar to lollypops,
they are better saved for other spots than a trick-or-treat bag.
…Nay!
Neotruffles…
Neotruffles are extremely rare, and are made of the best ingredients found
in all of Neopia. If you are lucky enough to snag one of these from restocking,
let alone trick-or-treating, you are one lucky Dog(lefox)! Don’t forget, it
is also a gourmet food, so that just screams, “Jackpot!” If you don’t like it,
you could sell it.
…Yay!
Bubble Gum…
Chew it! Chew it! Chewy bubble gum is an awesome year-round treat. With a wonderful
cotton candy flavor, this gum can be used anywhere at anytime. Also, because
of its cheap price, you can usually make out with more than one pack of bubble
gum if it’s getting handed out.
…Yay!
Candy Canes…
Ack! Keep them away! Candy canes are horrible for Halloween… half the time
they are left over from last Christmas. Christmas is the time for them to be
eaten, not Halloween.
…Nay!
Neodrops…
Wrapped in eye-catching plastic wrappers, neodrops are another very mobile
treat that you can take absolutely anywhere. Similar to bubble gum, you can
score more than one tasty neodrops because of their size and (somewhat) cheap
price.
…Yay!
Grarrl Gobstoppers…
Coming in over five different flavors, Grarrl Gobstoppers are the perfect treat
for Grarrls, and any other pet, as well. On the down side, however, this Tyrannian
made gobstopper collection includes many ingredients that no one would ever
even consider sticking in their mouths. Whether it be fish scales, blue fur,
mustard, or even rotten eggs, those horrid smells will seep in and infect other
candies in your trick-or-treat bag.
…Nay!
Gummy Quiggles…
I love Quiggles, and I love gummy things. It is only natural that I find myself
accustomed to Gummy Quiggles! Coming in the colors orange, red, yellow, and
green; they are unfortunately sticky: which we have learned is bad. Just look
at the lollypops.
…Nay!
Nimmo Bites…
The opposing competitor for Gummy Quiggles, I don’t like Nimmos or bites, but
I love Nimmo Bites! These aren’t as sticky as Gummy Quiggles; therefore they
can be shoved in your candy bag without damaging the other candies.
…Yay!
Pet Jelly Treats…
Of course you’ve seen those jelly foods shaped in the figure of Neopian pets…
I mean, who hasn’t? Unfortunately, these jelly-luscious treats aren’t all they’re
cracked up to be; they are slimy and sticky and get all over your candy, yet
another victim of the: ruin the other candy symptom.
…Nay!
Krawkberries…
They sure taste good! Coming in flavors named after popular Neopian fruits
(Zeenana, Tigerfruit, Thornberry, and Tchea) these natural style candies taste,
well, natural! As nice as they may seem, these Krawkberries are the essence
of evil: healthy food on Halloween! They put you against your cause to become
sugar-hyper with rotten teeth!
…Nay!
Toffee Apples…
These toffee covered apples are apples in the best time of their lives, until
you eat them. Then, they don’t really have much of a life, if you count apples
as having lives in the first place. Although a wonderful delicacy for autumn,
these apples don’t make good treats on Halloween. They take up too much space
in your trick-or-treating bag, and are somewhat healthy! Ew… healthy!
…Nay!
Ice Lollies…
This cool treat is made of artificially flavored ice, and comes in so many
shapes and sizes. These treats are, unfortunately, out of season by the time
of Halloween. Ice lollies are great for the summer; they will cool you off.
They are also great for the winter; after all, it is better to have it while
it’s cold. Autumn though… not a great treat. Besides, they will melt in your
trick-or-treat bag.
…Nay!
Jelly Beans…
Similar to the candy canes, jelly beans are NOT Halloween candies. They are
Easter candies. These can completely ruin a stomach; half the time you get these
treats from sloppy/lazy people that realize it is Halloween and get candy that
was left over from other holidays to hand out. Yuck.
…Nay!
Candy Corn…
Possibly the stickiest, smallest, nastiest treat in the world, candy corn is
always handed out on Halloween. Why? It has to be. Come on, candy corn in the
unofficial candy that represents Halloween. If you get these, then at least
you have Halloween spirit. Forget the other cons; they aren’t important.
…Yay!
Whether this guide helped you or not, please be sure to have a super scary
Halloween with candy and rotten teeth and all that other good stuff. I know
I will! *smiles deviously and throws eggs… at YOUR house*
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