90 Reasons to Return to Neopets as an Adult!

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     1. *gestures vaguely to the real world* Y’all want me to go outside?!

     2. Your college degree in economics will help you dominate the Neopian stock market. You can buy SO MUCH ASPARAGUS with all those Neopoints!

     3. You have a child/nephew/niece/other beloved kiddo who’s interested in the site, and you’ve got to show them the ropes!

     4. You recently had a nightmare about your Neopets starving and had to check on them.

     5. You think that with age has come the patience to start Kad Feeding (lol you’re so optimistic and so wrong but I support you)

     6. Your real-life pet is tired of you dressing them up, but your Neopets will never complain.

     7. Now that you’re on work-from-home, you need to polish your keyboard skills with a few games of Typing Terror.

     8. Cooking in real life is getting repetitive, but the Cooking Pot in Mystery Island and the Magic Cooking Vessel in Shenkuu’s Culinary Concoctions provide a nice change of pace.

     9. You can STILL save the heroes of Altador in the Altador Plot… and now, you’ve got all the time in the world!

     10. The Tyrannian Concert Hall still has shows going on— perfect to replace your cancelled summer plans.

     11. Now that you have wi-fi instead of dial-up, you’re finally fast enough to get goodies from the Money Tree!

     12. You can try and visit all the other new charity and second-hand shops that have popped up around Neopia!

     13. You remembered wanting to see Neopets Mobile and Lutari Island so badly— what can you find out online?

     14. You’ve spent the last 10 years hitting the Gym so you can beat up the Snowager. Go, live out your fate.

     15. You can understand some of the jokes and pop culture references around the site that you didn’t understand as a kid.

     16. Everyone in your household is tired of your jokes, but they’re all new to King Skarl!

     17. … You also kind of understand why he’s so grumpy. His life sounds difficult. :(

     18. Now that you’ve met people in real life who are unnervingly similar, the games of Cheat! are twice as exciting.

     19. You saw a picture of the Elderly colour Neopets somewhere and felt emotionally connected to them in an uncomfortable way. (Note to self— check for grey hairs on your next pass by the hall mirror)

     20. You had a sudden memory of your childhood dog named Poogle and spent far too long trying to remember where his name came from.

     21. You were spring cleaning and found your old Neopets merch collection.

     22. You then learned that Charity Corner is basically, like, Neopian spring cleaning and wanted to join in.

     23. You remembered spending hours watching NeoVision and wanted to see if it was still around.

     24. All your work publications are on hold, but you can still flex your writing muscles on the Neopian Times, Poetry Contest, Story Telling and more!

     25. There are so many new avatars for you to try and find!

     26. There are so many games that are SO MUCH harder than you remember… better be patient for those game avatars!

     27. Speaking of games, you can imagine that the TNT Staff Smasher game is actually made up of your co-workers who can’t find the mute button on your video calls. *smack smack*

     28. You’re excited to make pet names out of all the random vocabulary words you remember from your college foreign language class.

     29. Or scientific terms you learned in your last biology class.

     30. Speaking of your foreign language class, playing Neopets in another language can be a great way to practice!

     31. Redecorating your NeoHome is a lot easier than redecorating your real home.

     32. You’re running out of room for your real-life collections, but Neopets lets you have a whole gallery!

     33. Battledome behaviour is not encouraged in the real world.

     34. Stamp and coin collecting just hit different on Neopets.

     35. Also, new items pop up all the time for you to collect!

     36. At no point in the real world can you give an alien vending machine a Nerkmid in exchange for something weird or cool.

     37. Real-life is severely lacking in games like Gormball, Zorroball, Yooyuball, … just a lot of “ball” games, really.

     38. Very few places reward your loyalty with REALLY COOL SHIELDS in the real world!! Look at those userlookup shields!! So shiny!

     39. Where else can your pet’s pet have a pet?

     40. In lieu of going to your doctor, Splat-a-Sloth is a perfect reflex test… right?

     41. The NeoBoards are surprisingly full of people close-ish to your age group, so you can just shoot the breeze together.

     42. You need to brush up on restocking in the Neopian Shops so you can get what you want at the real-world market.

     43. Everyone’s nicer on Neopets.

     44. Like, seriously, SO NICE?? It’s so refreshing.

     45. The fetch quests that the Faeries can send you on make you feel useful again.

     46. You finally have your own pocket money to spend on the NC Wearables.

     47. And/or, you can finally pay for the Neopets Premium subscription.

     48. To reconnect with the online friend you haven’t spoken to in YEARS!

     49. You have a new appreciation for some of the pet species you didn’t care for as a child.

     50. The Altador Cup is likely your only sporting event not facing cancellation right now.

     51. Your philosophy courses may give you an extra advantage in all the brain teasers on the site.

     52. You can help newbies with all these great life skills you’ve learned!

     53. Who knows, maybe something you put in your SDB all those years ago is worth something now?

     54. Even if certain plots are over, it’s entertaining to go back and re-read all the plot comics!

     55. You now know the true importance of a Job Coupon.

     56. The auction house seems more fun now that you know the art of negotiation!

     57. The Neopian Times is a much more optimistic newspaper than anything you’ve been reading in real life.

     58. The Wheels of Neopia are your new replacement for game shows.

     59. Your tech is upgraded enough that your Beauty Contest submission doesn’t have to be a badly-scanned traditional artwork— digital has become so much more common!

     60. For all those coders, petpages are a good way to keep your skills sharp!

     61. Same for all those graphic designers— make those headers SHINE!

     62. The Neopets help-sites and fan-guides are so much more advanced than they used to be!

     63. Depending on how long you’ve had your account, you may have a UC (unconverted) pet— a huge rarity now! You’re basically a historian!

     64. Speaking of historians, younger Neopians will be in AWE that you can tell them about all the cool things you used to see on the site.

     65. Your roleplaying and writing skills have probably gotten much better!

     66. There’s, theoretically, all the time in the world to find the Secret Laboratory Maps…

     67. You can find the secret path to Jelly World… which, actually, doesn’t exist at all, please forget what you heard.

     68. The Scratchcards and Lottery feel less rebellious now that you’re of age, but they’re still fun with great prizes!

     69. There are even more easter eggs and hidden fun things to discover on the site— try to find them all!

     70. Adventuring around Neopia can replace the trips you were going to take in real life— who needs to get on a plane when you can go to Faerieland?

     71. Your account might be old enough to get some special perks!

     72. The Neopedia is actually really interesting. Go ahead and learn something new about Neopia!

     73. Can’t go to the Farmer’s Market in real life? Skip the middle man and go to Pick Your Own!

     74. Games like Maths Nightmare and Imperial Exam can keep your math and spelling skills sharp— important for any age.

     75. You might not be able to go to the animal shelter in real life, but the Neopian Pound, however, is always open waiting for you to take a new friend home.

     76. Games like Cellblock or Shapeshifter might be more fun instead of frustrating for you now.

     77. You might not be able to make it to the real-life stores, but there are tons of user-run stores and speciality site-stores to go to in Neopia!

     78. You can finally show off your fancy painted Neopets without worrying about Boochi zapping them!

     79. With so many wearable contacts, wigs, and make-ups, your Neopets can rock the latest trends before you try them out.

     80. Who knows, maybe your guild is still active? They’ll be so surprised to see you come back— and maybe throw you a few presents.

     81. You now have the time to take on NeoQuest I and II — they’re so, so worth it!

     82. You can’t get in the Gourmet Club in real life just for eating weird food.

     83. Nor do people give you awards for reading books! (At least, not as an adult anyway…)

     84. You can send NeoGreetings to all your friends— saves money on postage, too!

     85. Your birthday party may look different in real life this year, but the Birthday Header will always be familiar.

     86. Your phone might not have a place to put charms anymore, but they’re still fun to collect on Neopets!

     87. Now that you can set your own bedtime, you can explore things like Deadly Dice and other things that go bump in the Neopian night.

     88. Your real-life trophy cabinet’s been empty for a few years but on Neopets…

     89. The nostalgia will give you a good few days of entertainment alone, at least!

     90. Because, beyond everything else, Neopets can be for EVERYONE! Including you. ;) Come play!