| White Weewoos don't exist. *shifty eyes* |
Circulation: 193,961,412 |
Issue: 723 | 11th day of Running, Y18 |
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"Adventures in Krawk Island" by dunefurandlilypelt
"Rare treasures on sale! Get them now! We brought these back all the way in the Lost Desert, 'ey're so rare," a typical Pirate merchant shouted to everyone in hearing distance on the Warf Wharf. That meant everyone. The guy was loud.
Lillian rolled her eyes. All of these pirates were scammers and frauds.
The Speckled Uni watched curiously as an obviously gullible female Pirate Shoyru approached the merchant. "What are they?" the lady asked.
"Rare gold gems from the caves deep beneath the Lost Desert," he told her. Lillian raised an eyebrow.
"What's the price?"
A greedy glint lit up the merchant's eyes, and Lillian glared at him. Yes, these merchants were all the same.
"I think 250 Dubloons would be a fair price for these treasures," the merchant said with a slippery tongue. "A bargain, even!"
250 anything was an enormous amount for anybody on Krawk Island. Lillian gave a little gulp. This guy was a total rip-off.
Just as the Shoyru lady was about to accept, the Uni stepped forward. "Ma'am, sorry to barge in, but you're being cheated."
The merchant glared at her. "Let me explain," Lillian began.
"Anyone who's been to the Lost Desert knows that its sand would never allow for caves. It's just too loose." Lillian told the customer and the merchant. "So you're obviously lying about where the gems come from."
Before the angry merchant could reply, she kept on going. "Besides, gold has never been found in the Lost Desert. Only rubies, emeralds, and the like," Lillian informed them. It was apparent the merchant hadn't done his research.
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I held my right front hoof over the piece of paper on the table in front of me, then brought it down hard. When I pulled my hoof away, there was a glowing golden hoofprint there. “OK,” I began, looking at the Shoyru across the table from me, “My hoofprint on the contract means that all terms are fulfilled and payment has been handed over. The contract is now closed and cannot be reopened. No further changes can be made, no details can be added or removed, no debates or arguments will hold merit. Are we clear?”
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