An Interview with a Very Rich Slorg

     These days, it was the home to a variety of Slorgs. And one Slorg in particular was very famous.

     This Slorg was said to be extremely generous. Giving out Neopoints left and right, to basically anyone who dared to enter the abandoned shop. Sometimes a little bit, sometimes a lot, but always something. The Spooky Petpet was said to not seem any different from the other Slorgs. He was said to be green, slimy, and had a big smile on his face. I had not met the Slorg before myself, nor had I ever been in the shop. There were times I wondered if the Slorg was like Jelly World; completely made up, but many Neopians swore by his wealthy existence.

     So today, I found myself in the shop when I could not contain my investigative feelings anymore.

     I paused to look at the pamphlets outside of the shop before I entered. It gave notice of a Slorg infestation, and if the citizens could please help chase them away. I wondered who put these notices up, before I took a deep breath and stepped inside.

     The shop was dimly lit somehow, the faint light reflecting on multiple slime tracks all around the shop. Old, and broken down signs with once bright colours and letters were everywhere, equally as covered in slime as the floors and walls were. It had a resemblance to the Almost Abandoned Attic, but without the ever-so-friendly Ambra, and with way more slime. Every now and then I could see two eyes pop up, but how could I know it would be the Slorg?

     And then I heard it, the clinking of Neopoints in front of my feet. Right behind it, a particularly rich-looking Slorg. You may wonder why he looked rich, but I couldn’t explain it. He just radiated Ultimate Riches. He looked like he shopped at the Hidden Tower on the regular, and I just knew for sure his stamp album was up-to-date. His slime looked particularly slimy, and his eyes seemed brighter than the average Slorg.

     Before he could slither away, I called out. “Sir! Sir, are you available for a comment?”

     The Slorg turned around. It seemed to wait for me to ask more. I immediately pulled out my Battle Duck Notepad and Dark Battle Duck Pen. I wasn’t sure how long he would entertain me, so I asked my most burning questions:

     “Sir, you have blessed Neopians for years with your wealth. Why do you do this, and where does this wealth come from? Why do you live here?”

     The Rich Slorg looked at me, with a signature smile. I waited for his answer, expecting a detailed, long answer, ready to take extra personal notes. Being a freelance investigative reporter wasn’t that glamorous, and I could definitely use the tips to upgrade my Silver Saver bank account.

     Instead, he just kept staring at me. My heart sank in my shoes. My interview with the local invisible Gelert was made up of more words, and I didn’t even have the microphone in the right direction half the time.

     “Sir?” I attempted again. I carefully stepped forward, making sure I wouldn’t slip due to all the slime. I was determined to get answers from this Slorg. “Any comment?”

     Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

     I started to wonder, as I kept looking at his happy face, if the reason for his wealth was maybe not as clean as I suspected. Maybe it wasn’t something as simple as an early and smart Kacheek and Sons Landscaping stock investment. Maybe it was a secret underground Food Club betting ring. Or maybe the people were right, this place had ties to Dr. Sloth.

     I was certain I had just discovered a breakthrough. It was the perfect crime, no one would suspect a cute-looking Slorg. I smiled as I looked from my notepad to the Slorg. I would never have to intern, and just fetch coffee for Tobias Simmer and Hovri Sweet ever again. I would not have to conduct interviews in Tyrannia again, understanding less than half of it. This would be the ultimate breakthrough, all I had to do was press him.

     “What are you hiding, mister Rich Slorg?” I asked, a big frown on my face. “Running from the Defenders of Neopia, aren’t you?”

     Silence.

     “Did you betray Queen Fyora? Are you doing a job for Jhudora?” I was getting desperate, throwing names and probable schemes out there. Nothing broke the Slorg’s classic happy face, nothing. As I was flipping through my notepad, looking for possible stories to confront him with, I heard the sound of the entrance door opening behind me.

     I turned around to look at the Neopian entering, it was a Shadow Lupe. He growled at a Slorg, before taking a few more steps and collecting the slime-covered money the Rich Slorg had thrown my way. “Isn’t this place great? I’m saving up for an Uni’s shopping spree,” he smiled at me, before quickly making his exit again.

     I turned back around to continue my cross-examination of the Rich Slorg, but he was nowhere to be found. Instead of the Slorg, another pile of Neopoints was laying in the slime trail.

     I counted the slime-covered Neopoints as I collected them, there were exactly a hundred of them. I waited for another short while, before I left, my pockets and mind heavier than they were before. I realised Neopia would never get the answers we were after.

     The sun in Neopia Central was a nice change from the dim and grim insides of the shop. The blank page on my notepad was almost blinding, causing me to bump into a familiar face. The Shadow Lupe from earlier.

     “Hey you!” he beamed. “What did you get earlier?”

     “A hundred Neopoints,” I muttered.

     “You don’t seem that happy about it.”

     I frowned, my eyes switching between the dark fur and the bright white page. “Don’t you ever wonder, why that Slorg gives out so many Neopoints? Or how?”

     “Not really,” the Lupe shrugged. “I just accept it. Some people are just that generous, you know, it almost feels mean to question a good deed like that.”

     Maybe the Lupe was right. Not everything needs rhyme or reason, and there was no evidence the Rich Slorg was nefarious. All we knew about him was that he was extremely generous, and maybe that was all we had to know about him.

     I nodded, “You’re right. What did you get?”

     “Forty-nine Neopoints,” the Lupe smiled. “See you around!”

     Forty-nine? My eyes squinted as I brought my gaze back to my notepad, writing the number down.

     I guess not everything is a story.