The Sisterhood of Terra and Phee: Part Fve

      After I say goodbye to Lana, who has been talking with a prospective owner the past few days -- a scholar, I believe -- I write a Neomail to Tricia and update her. She was adopted two months ago by a similarly shy and incredibly sweet girl with two other pets who Tricia seemed to love immediately. Then I say goodbye to Bert, who has become a more or less a friendly presence to me since I stood up to him shortly after Terra left. Then it was time to say goodbye to everything else.

      The cafe gets a farewell, and I say my goodbyes to the gift shop, too. I wave to the chefs, the salesmen, the manager. And then I have to do the hardest thing I've done in months. I say goodbye to that old red sofa, faded now but allowed to remain only because I had stubbornly told my manager that if he threw it out to find a replacement, he may as well plan to find a replacement for me, too. Because I could not, would not stay. Not without at least that little daily reminder of her and her promise. Being a kind Elderlyboy Lupe, he had agreed. Looking back, I'm not sure why. It didn't make good business sense. But the truth is that he loves me like a daughter, I think. And in all honesty, I think he was relieved to give that old couch a reason to stay. Someone else to blame it on when people ask. Something tells me it was important to him, too, though he never did let me in on the specifics of why.

      I never got over Terra leaving. He never got over whatever made that sofa special to him, either. But we learned how to live. Because they would want that. And because we deserve to be truly alive. Terra had taught me to love myself. And I have taken it to heart. Living is a crucial part of that.

      So that is what I did. It's what I'm doing. Seeing all of Neopia, one place at a time. Participating in cultures I'd never even heard of before, from the Gadgadsbogen Festival to the Shenkuu Lunar Festival and everywhere in between. I'm meeting pets and owners I never would have, from startup entrepreneur restaurateurs to Elderlyboy- and Elderlygirl-run establishments that are just as much a part of the city as the gardens in front of the neighbors' Neohomes -- places no less important than the names of the cities themselves.

      I am loving myself, without any potions. Without any paintbrushes. Without excessive customization changing me into someone else.

      The only potion I ever took was the one she gave me. Words. Words that told me I was beautiful, that it didn't get better than me. She was wrong, of course. I wouldn't be me without her. But she was right, too, because she wouldn't have been her without me, like a cup of Borovan cannot be a cup of Borovan without milk. It's good without, but with the addition, it becomes something more. That's how we are with one another. That's the power of love. The power of words. The power of a memory.

      It's why I try to create as many memories as I can. Why I collect as many as I can hear about from other pets, like so many pieces of priceless gold that you won't find in any Shop Wizard hunt or Trading Post offering. Why I share as many as I can in the form of the written word and a couple pictures. Because this...this is life. It moves. It breathes. And then it's past. But the words we write as we move, the ones we speak as we breathe...those will last.

      Still, if I have to be honest and if I have to look on the bright side, I think it's doing me some good to be apart and find out who I am without relying on her to do the living for me. That way, when we are reunited for good, it will be as two whole pets.

      "Evening!" a Cybunny page gasps while catching his breath. His traditional Shenkuu garb was not made for running.

      I stop writing with my quill, the one I'd just been using to describe a street vendor selling lanterns, long enough to look up. "Yes?"

      "Are you Phee?"

      I frown in confusion. "Yes?" I've gained some sort of reputation over the past little while, it's true. But I'm far from being at the level necessary for pages to recognize me in the streets.

      "You're Terra's sister?"

      A jolt shoots down my spine. Did something terrible happen? I haven't been receiving Neomails recently. I've been worried, but thought perhaps I was overreacting. Now I wish I'd made my way to Faerieland to check up on her. Or was it Carter? Has something befallen him instead?

      "Finally!" the Cybunny breaks my concentration. He grins, but looks like he's about to flop down on the cobblestones and not get up for about a week. "I have been looking..." he takes one last gasp, "ALL OVER for you! Good grief! You are a very hard pet to find!"

      "Is everything okay? Is Terra all right? And Carter?"

      The Cybunny waves a paw dismissively. "They're fine. Just a little panicked, is all. From what I hear, they've been tracking you for ages!"

      "What do you mean --?"

      Just then, I hear the fluttering of wings, a particular sound that I haven't heard in months. And then I stumble forward, almost toppling into the Cybunny, because a Faerie Ruki is attached to my back. Laughter and tears mix from behind me, and before I know it, I'm joining in.

      "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!" Terra shouts.

      "Soon, it'll be the Hospital, because you're going to damage my ears!" I say back to her, in less of a shout. "What do you mean, where have I been? Where have YOU been? I've been waiting forever! And why did you stop Neomailing me?!"

      She releases her clinging grip on me and turns me by the shoulders to face her. "It's been nine months! We were ready by month six! Good and ready, too. We had your room set up!"

      My stomach falls. Three months I'd been waiting, and I didn't have to? But then I think of what I've been doing in those three months. Three months ago is when I started writing, traveling, and critiquing in earnest. Everything I said I wanted to. Everything Terra had always encouraged me to do. And I think, well, at least I have something to show for those lost months. Something to make both of us proud.

      Wait. "Why didn't you Neomail me?" I ask again.

      Carter walks up behind Terra, looking nearly as thrilled as she does. He puts an arm over her shoulder. They are obviously the best of friends. It makes my heart happy to see, and I realize then that I've grown. Because before, I would have been jealous.

      "We went to the Pound," he says. "But the Techo -- scary fellow, by the way -- told us you'd taken a job as a food critic and sight-seeing journalist. He said you were hardly ever home -- I mean, at the Pound -- anymore. But he could look you up in the systems because you still were technically in the Pound. But you were labeled as Stuck. I don't know why or what happened. But the systems wouldn't let us look you up."

      "And then we saw an article in the Neopian Times! It was from a week or two ago. And it said to look out for the final installment being published in the 700th edition. By the way, I am SO PROUD OF YOU! The 700th edition! That means you have massive credentials now as a food critic! But anyway, when I read the 700th, it mentioned you'd be in Shenkuu next. So we came here looking for you. We've been all over the place! My tutoring internship -- I have a tutoring internship now, by the way -- let me come with Carter to find you. I told them that I loved the job, but nothing was more important than my sister." She grins and squeezes me again. "Anyway, that's why the Neomails didn't go through. Because I wasn't sure where to send them, and I guess the Pound didn't route them correctly since you weren't listed right."

      My brain is working in overdrive, trying to keep up. It occurs to me that we've both begun living our dreams. That all those years talking about life and what we wanted has actually paid off. It was coming true, right in front of me. I see Terra's smile and hear her speedy words, and recognize something carefree and childish in them. It sounds like rest and trust. Like someone who is being cared for, and who can finally be themselves. I realize all of a sudden that I've dropped my quill and journal, and that the Cybunny page has hopped off to who knows where.

      Finally, some sort of clarity breaks through. "Wait, so does this mean that today...like, right now....you're here to --?" I don't finish the sentence, by my face nearly splits at the seams from the smile that's growing.

      "That's right," Carter says, grinning. "Phee, we would love to have you with us, finally! We're so excited! Would you --?"

      Terra interrupts him. "Phee, we're here to take you home!"

      And it's the most wonderful thing, hearing her say my name again while also not relying on her saying it to tell me who I am.

      It's the most wonderful thing, seeing her cared for.

      It's incredible, the feeling you get when someone says 'home' and they mean it to include you. To be a living, breathing thing and not just a space you occupy.

      "I think," I say, "that there's nothing else I would love more in all of Neopia." I laugh, my heart growing too big for my chest once more.

      Yes, we've both accomplished so much in our time apart. Become comfortable with ourselves and who we are. But nothing can make your heart grow like family.

      The End.