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The Top 5 Tastiest Baked Goods! (And The 5 Worst)


by coldblanket

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G'day, Neopia! I’m back, baby, and this time we’re covering the top 5 most delicious baked confectioneries in all of Neopia! (And 5 of the worst!) I’m sorry for the long delay, did you miss me? Anywho, the wait for the next part is finally over! Let’s move into it!

     5. Madeleine Sandwich Cookies

     Served hot and fresh, these perfectly round, spongy cookies are definitely tasty! The added frosting really adds a nice texture, and makes them taste just a little sweeter. Perfect for when you're really craving those sweet foods! I bet one bite could have you feeling great after any situation!

     4. Lava Cupcake

     This sounds like it would be quite delicious, considering it may contain some kind of lava cake centre! It also looks very pleasing. The description claims that it is moist, so it really does sound like a delicious cupcake! Exploding with flavour, if you will. The decorating is done very well, it really reminds me of Moltara! I really love Moltara! Though, it would have been cool if there were some added lava bubbles, for that convincing lava feel! I do really think this would be a tasty treat!

     3. Fresh Strawberry Doughnut

     Ohhh goodness, where do I begin? The beautifully aligned strawberries, the sprinkles, the DELICIOUS looking doughnut bun - It sounds heavenly! Like something straight out of Faerieland! It sounds like the perfect breakfast treat, especially if you’re craving those tasty little deep-fried wheels of dough! Really, all benefits if you decide on eating this. You're happy, your tongue is happy, and hey! You get some dopamine from it, too! Some good, healthy things from the strawberries, too. What would make this dessert even better? A nice dusting of powdered sugar. Despite that, it’s definitely a 10 out of 10! Great with a nice, piping hot cup of Borovan.

     2. Blueberry Deluxe Cake

     This cake sounds good just from hearing it, and the description makes it sound mouth-watering! A whole lot of love? Sign me up for a slice! It makes me think of grandma baking a fresh cake on Sunday morning, for everyone to enjoy. If I could get my hands on something so delicious, I would probably eat it all myself! The decorations are simplistic yet beautiful, giving it that classic country feel that makes you feel cosy. The frosting looks really, really good. Plus, you can never go wrong with blueberries, can you? Unless you don’t like blueberries - This one might not be right for you.

     1. Chocolate Elephante Ear

     Crispy, flaky, chocolate-covered.. What’s not to love?! The comforting crunch of the first bite, the flavours dancing on your tongue with the hot, gooey chocolate adding that additional sweetness, and washing it all down with Kau Kau Farm’s delicious milk. That mouth-watering, delicious wonder of the Fair right at the comfort of your own home! The smell of it may even bring you to think of the Fair! Each bite is like fireworks going off with a huge bang of amazing flavour.

     Do I have your mouth watering? Your stomach rumbling? Well, sad to say it, but I’m about to spoil that feeling! Sorry, but I did promise the worst of the lot, as well! It's only fair to keep my promise. With that said, let’s move on to the list of the top 5 worst baked goodies!

     5. Radioactive Sloth Cake

     Excuse me, huh?! WHAT?! Whose idea was this?! This sounds incredibly dangerous and incredibly, well, gross! Plus, there are potential TRAPS in all of the Sloth cakes! Couldn’t these radioactive cakes potentially harm the health of our beloved Neopets, as well? How terrible! I wouldn’t recommend this, not even in my wildest dreams.

     4. Chomby Rock Cake

     Ow. Tastes like rock. Do not recommend it. 0/10. If you - for some odd reason - want to feed it to your pet, make sure they have strong enough teeth. Or you have enough NP to buy them a new set!

     3. Discounted Cake

     Just, ew. The container it comes in is all chipped and greasy, and it smells a bit off. It baffles my mind how the candle even stayed lit for such a long time. I would NEVER eat this, who knows how long it stayed on the shelves? On top of that, why wasn’t it properly sealed in anything? No plastic wrap, no cardboard pastry box - Nothing at all! Not a very smart move on the seller’s behalf. I can definitely see why this is on the discount shelf. I don’t think even the biggest of cheapskates would buy this.

     2. Dung Berry Tonu Cupcake

     In my first article, I already addressed my strong dislike of all the dung items. But honestly, this is crossing the line! The cute, delicious Tonu Cupcakes we all know and love, ruined by this disgusting flavour! The dung berry ALONE is definitely unpleasant to the pallet, and I think many others could agree on this. Even the way it looks makes me want to stay away from it! Or poke it with a stick.. Both are sensible options.

     1. Dung Cookie

     Alright, I’m pretty sure this is just a smooshed pile of dung with some gross brown speckles - Possibly raisins! Gross! I don’t know how anyone is supposed to even consume this. Or look at it and think “Yeah, that looks delicious. I’ll have that for my midnight snack.” I bet just the smell could make you faint. I could never ever imagine this so-called ‘dessert’ even getting within 5 feet of my mouth! I would never be so cruel to feed this to one of my pets. Not even a Skeith!

     And that concludes the newest addition to my Neopian food-critiquing articles! There may be more to come, there may not be - That’s for me to know, and for you to decide! Thank you, Neopia! (An honourable mention to the Strawberry Cream Cybunny Paw. They really did sound great! But the Madeleine Sandwich cookies grabbed me.)

 
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