Caution: Quills may be sharp Circulation: 115,191,906 Issue: 230 | 9th day of Running, Y8
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The Haunted Fairground


by rebeanth

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HAUNTED WOODS - Picture this: it’s the weekend, your pets are out of Neoschool for two whole days, you’ve got nothing planned, and there's 48 glorious hours ahead of you. So what are you going to do? If your Neopets are anything like mine, they won’t want to sit around your Neohome all day; they’d love a day out! Now, the question is, where to go? Happy Valley is fun, if you can put up with the cold. Meri Acres farm is always worth a visit, but there's only so many potatoes you can count before that becomes a tad boring. Mystery Island? Been there, done that, postcard’s in the mail. So what is there to do?

They say that a change is as good as a holiday, even if it is only for one day. So why not try something different? How does a day at the Deserted Fairground sound?

*deep intakes of breath all around*

Ohh-kay…that was awkward.

I take it you need a little convincing, and that’s what I’m about to do. So keep reading, and I’ll take you on a grand tour of the fairgrounds!

Upon entering the Deserted Fairgrounds, you may notice the so-called “eerie” atmosphere it has, what with the “abandoned” decorating scheme, the gnarled trees, and the darkness and all. Many people wrongly assume that because of this atmosphere, the place is evil, oh no, we’re all going to die, run, blah blah blah. Now, let’s think about this rationally. The place is a FAIRGROUND. Fairgrounds have the reputation of having eerie atmospheres. Think of how different it would be if you walked in and there were flowers and buzzes and faeries all over the place, and a sweet little Kau running the Coconut Shy. Sure, it’d be nice, and non-freaky, but where’s the adventure in that?

Welcoming you into the Deserted Fairgrounds is Sidney, at the Deserted Fairground Scratchcard Kiosk. Nothing scary about him at all. Yes, he does exesssesssively trail off on wordsss with “s” in them, but that’s because he’s freezing cold! Look at the poor guy, he has to wear old rags out in the middle of the woods. Don’t believe me? Just take a look at him, he’s turning blue from the cold. So come on, buy a Scratchcard, and help poor Sidney earn a living. And who knows, you might win a nice prize too!

Now let's take a stroll over to Test Your Strength. On the way there, you can stop by and gawk at the Ghost Neopets. And dream about someday owning one *sigh*. Carrying on, here we are at Test Your Strength. Say hi to Arnold if you feel like it, you can’t miss him. He’s the one standing there hollering, “Roll up! Roll up!” at the top of his lungs. Test Your Strength is a great game, all you have to do is pick up the mallet, give it a big swing and see how well you hit! It’s easy, fun, and affordable, and you could turn out to be an elite mallet swinging champion *victory music*. I hear it pays well.

Right down the back of the fairground you’ll find the Carnival of Terror. You shoot the Robot Chia Clowns with your spiffy gun, they throw pies at you. Sounds like fun to me. :)

Right next to the Carnival of Terror is a personal favourite of mine, the Coconut Shy! One of the newer attractions at the Deserted Fairground, it’s an addictive little game. The concept is simple. You try to hit the coconuts with a ball. If you hit a coconut, you win fifty Neopoints; if you nearly knock one down you win three hundred Neopoints; and, wait for it, if you knock down a coconut you win a grand total of ten thousand Neopoints, plus a special prize! So, let's review, shall we: you get to throw tennis balls at a bunch of coconuts, and you can win stuff from doing so. What are you waiting for? Go! Now!

No, wait! I haven’t finished! When I said “now” I meant now as in after you’ve finished reading my article! *rolls eyes* People these days…

Anyway, making your way back to the entrance of the fairground, you’ll pass by the Haunted Weaponry shop. It pays to have a quick look, if you’re interested, because there are some great battle items in there. Plus, the shop owner has a cool shiny cloak. Oooh!

You’ll pass Sidney again on your way to the west side of the fairground. Go on, buy another Scratchcard. You know you want to. :)

Further on, you’ll see another shop the Deserted Fairground has to offer. The Spooky Furniture shop has some terrific finds for your Neohome. After visiting this shop, you’ll wonder how you survived for so long without an Oozing Candle. It’s also a good place to pick up a nice souvenir to remind you of your day at the fairground.

Behind the Spooky Furniture shop is the Wheel of Misfortune. It was originally called the Wheel of Fortune, but apart from those “oh-so-cute” faeries stealing its name, some bored Neopians thought it would be funny to add “mis” to the sign. Trust me, I was there. No, wait…I wasn’t…forget you read that… Okay, back to spinning the wheel. For the small price of one hundred Neopoints you can give the wheel a big spin and watch it go round and round and round! On one particular occasion, when the wheel slowed to a stop, the friendly wheel spinner (who requests to remain unidentified) said to me, “Congratulations!!! You win a Von Kougra Plushie!” Wow! I’ve always wanted one of those! No, really, I have. :)

Well, it’s been a fun day at the fairground, but it’s not quite time to go home yet. You can pick up something to eat at the Spooky Food stand. I recommend the Pumpkin Pie, it’s delicious. You can also try a Spooky Doughnut, Chokato Ghostkersandwich, Skeith Juice Cocktail, or even a Squishy Brain Wrap. Whatever takes your fancy, it’s all there.

That wasn’t too bad, was it? See, a day at the fairground isn’t such a bad idea after all. Many people spread rumours about the place, but I’ll let you be the judge. I myself have spent many days there, frantically trying to knock down a coconut, and there's nothing wrong with me! *chuckle* So, next time your Neopets are bored, surprise them with a trip to the Deserted Fairground. They’ll love you for it.

 
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