Theories on the Origin of Meuka

"Formed entirely from mucus, the origins of this mutated Meerca are unknown. Maybe a paint brush gone wrong, or perhaps a freak created by one of Sloth's hideous experiments... we will never know.

Meuka can be seen slithering around the nastier regions of the Haunted Woods eating, well.. devouring everything in his path. His sharp jaws can cut through the vegetation like butter... and the same also goes for young Neopets who wander astray. Avoid!"

According to the Gallery of Evil, home of the stories of the most despicable villains of Neopia, Meuka's origins are unknown. Is it really enough just knowing that he lurks around the Haunted Woods eating everything in sight and spreading illness for his own amusement? How did his jaws come to be so sharp? How can a Meerca be composed of mucus of all things? Gross.

These pressing questions called for an investigation. We did try to schedule an interview with Meuka, but alas, he refused to pause his shenanigans and make time for us. After cornering him in the Deserted Fairground, he declined to meet with us and promptly sneezed on our pets and gave them the Sneezles. (He then proceeded to give some other passerby Sneezles too after they landed on the disease space on the Wheel of Misfortune. Can you believe his nerve?)

Regardless, the point is, we were unable to talk to him about his oh so mysterious origin. So we came up with some theories all on our own! Meuka will undoubtedly not be pleased when he reads this article (which he inevitably will because all villains tend to be self-obsessed) but in our defense, we did try searching for the truth but to no avail.

Without further ado, here are our thoughts on the elusive creation of Meuka:

1) Paintbrush Gone Wrong

Paintbrushes have been a part of Neopia for as long as we can remember. It's possible to stumble across them via random events or win them from the alien vending machine or fruit machine. You can also attain them by converting world challenge maps or of course purchasing them from the Trading Post or auctions. There are a number of ways in which we users can get a hold of paintbrushes but perhaps the most rare and random way is receiving one from Jacko the Phantom Painter.

Now the question here is: does Jacko design the colors himself and make the paintbrush before handing them out? Is he the mastermind behind all of the beautiful colors available to our pets? Maybe he is or maybe he's not, we don't claim to have the answer to one of the most intriguing mysteries on this site. What we do believe is that maybe gifting all these paintbrushes sparked Jacko's artistic spirit and inspired him to try creating his own paintbrush or two.

It's possible that he tried to mix a Green Paint Brush with a Speckled Paint Brush and got that Mucus color. Does green plus speckled equal mucus? Were those the only two ingredients involved? Was there some sort of super secret mucus paint brush that Jacko created and then destroyed after accidentally unleashing Meuka on the poor, unsuspecting population? As the Gallery of Evil suggests, Meuka could have come from from a paintbrush gone wrong! We'll never know how exactly it happened but Jacko messing up some sort of experiment is at the top of our list for how Meuka might have come to be.

2) A Dr. Frank Sloth Creation

We have a few more extravagant theories hidden up our sleeves, but we thought we'd first cover the other obvious speculation also mentioned in the Gallery of Evil: perhaps Meuka was a direct result of Sloth's infamous experiments. It's entirely possible that Sloth whipped Meuka up in a lab and let him go, free to roam the many worlds and both irritate and infect us all.

Sloth tends to be quite proud of his handiwork, though. From advanced technological resources to armies of robots and clones, he's still got the darker half of the Space Station at his disposal. He's capable of anything, really. And always very excited to boast about his latest mastermind to take over all of Neopia.

So keeping his style in mind and accounting for his narcissism, if Sloth really did create Meuka it was definitely way back in Y2 when he was just starting his career and lifelong ambition of being Neopia's most fearsome villain. This assumption is coming from the fact that he hasn't publicly taken credit for creating Meuka meaning he either wasn't proud of his work (who can blame him? Even the great Dr. Sloth can get sick from Meuka's germs) or because he was not responsible.

We have no way of being sure, but quite honestly, we're highly suspicious. It is the Dr. Frank Sloth we're talking about after all. When he's around, anything is possible, whether it be good (he does hand out transmogrification potions after all), bad, or dramatically catastrophic!

3) Lab Ray Zap

Ah, our dear friend the Mad Lab Ray Scientist, our favorite crazed academic. Our third theory is that Meuka came from the scientist miscalculating certain calibrations when firing up the ray. Similar to the other two theories, this one is also experiment based, which makes sense considering the large number of self-proclaimed geniuses we have wandering about.

We believe that maybe when developing the ultra rare snot color, he overestimated the proportion of mucus needed and when experimenting on a innocent Meerca he created... MEUKA. Afterwards he would have realized his mistake and adjusted the proportions resulting in what we now know as those oddly endearing yet simultaneously contagious snot pets!

It's not at all farfetched. He had the means, the equipment, the motive... everything fits! He zaps pets for a living. Could he have messed with the strict formulas and accidentally created Meuka?

We think it may be so!

4) Excess Meuka Drops

First of all, we'd like to point out that the description for this icky looking food is: "Eww gross, you can't honestly expect your pet to eat this!" Our point being, right off the bat, meuka drops are a unique spooky food, and we don't mean that in a positive way.

Here's a possible scenario for you all to think about:

A Haunted Woods enthusiast came across these meuka drops in Spooky Foods and was fascinated by them. The shopkeeper was eating his mid-afternoon snack, meuka drops, when this user noticed him. Having never seen them being sold, he asked the shopkeeper why he didn't sell them and if he could try some. The shopkeeper refused and claimed they were too rare. He instead recommended that the user check the shop wizard.

Our Haunted Woods fan followed this advice and bought these meuka drops in bulk since each serving only cost around 120 neopoints. He then returned home and only fed his poor little green Meerca meuka drops for weeks and weeks.

Then one day, the Meerca's owner woke up to see his precious neohome covered in snot. His darling Meerca had quadrupled in size and he stood snarling in the doorway, dripping slimy green mucus onto the ground. His parting words were a harsh "You did this to me!" and a sneeze so forceful it shook the neohome's very foundation.

And with that, the Meerca, Meuka, was gone.

He's been terrorizing people ever since, making people sick and beating them up in the battledome from the incurable germs that the enormous amount of meuka drops caused.

Is this a true story? Well, we're not sure! This is the fourth theory in a list of five and we think all of them are plausible. Stay away from the meuka drops is all we're saying, just to be safe! Because you never know...

5) Kauvara's Sneeze

Our final theory on the origin of Meuka is a little complicated but still as probable as the rest. Kauvara's Magic Shop is the one and only original source for morphing potions in the Neopian Market. Bearing that in mind, it must be difficult to meet the demands of all Neopians.

Like any other Neopian, Kauvara is susceptible to illness. We believe that she went to work while suffering from the Neo Flu in a desperate attempt to meet her weekly deadline for potion brewing. She just had to make 100 more morphing potions before Half Price Day and she couldn't afford to miss a day of potion making!

So despite feeling awful and sick, she went to her shop... only to sneeze and cough all over her latest batch of morphing potions. Recognizing that her precious potions had been contaminated and that her hard work had gone to waste, she discarded the infected potions as much as it disappointed her to do so.

Or so she thought.

We think it's possible that Kauvara had a particularly rare, severe strain of the Neo Flu and that she accidentally forgot to get rid of one of the green Meerca morphing potions she sneezed on!

It eventually went on sale, someone purchased it, and thus... Meuka was born!

And so there you have it, the five potential ways that Meuka came to be, our very own theories on the origin of Meuka! We can't prove any of them and there's no one scenario we support over another but we definitely wish we could knew the absolute truth. But for now, all we can do is speculate.

Thank you for patiently reading through what you probably perceived to be crazy conspiracy theories! Everyone has to come from somewhere. So where did Meuka come from? Feel free to brainstorm on your own and see if you can think of anything to add.

When it comes to Neopia's villains, particularly Meuka, the possibilities are endless!