100 Ways to Become Famous

Also by chocolateisamust

SOME THEATRE - Joey200010 and Chocolateisamust were over at Joey's Neohome, talking fame over with Joey's skunk Usul, Flowal.

"I'll be famous one day," Flowal vowed, practicing her signature on a piece of lined paper.

"Sure you will," Chocolate's Kougra scoffed.

"I will!" the Usul insisted. "I just need to find out how!"

It was then that an idea hit Chocolate, sitting quietly in the corner. She and Joey should write a Neopian Times article about how to become famous! Telling Joey of her idea, the two of them quickly began scribbling down ideas of how to become famous. And here is the final list!

100 Ways to Become Famous (or at least pretend)

#100. Steal a famous person's identity.
#99. Tell those casting a play a fake sob story about your life. Maybe, if it gets really dramatic, they'll cast you out of pity.
#98. Be one of those people who plays an instrument and/or sings outside of the Food Shop with a hat for donations (the term is "buskers" -Joey). If you're good enough, maybe somebody involved with show business can book you a role.
#97. Tie up your friends and family and neighbours and make them watch you perform. It may not be fame, but if you really have no talent or are simply unlucky, it's as close as you're going to get.
#96. Scour the Neopian Times for ads advertising open auditions.
#95. Drink the Rainbow Pool. It will get you onto page one!
#94. Write a great story for the Neopian Times, and let the n00b mail commence!
#93. Start blocking neofriend requests and neomails. People will think you're famous, and news travels surprisingly fast.
#92. Get a famous friend. Maybe some of his/her talent will rub off on you.
#91. Win pet spotlight.
#90. Whine to an author friend about being under-appreciated, until they surrender and do a couple of collaborations with you. If you don't have an author friend, get one.
#89. Win the lottery. C'mon, it isn't that hard!
#88. Write a series of articles in the Neopian Times (e.g. 100 Ways to...)
#87. Post a LOT at the neoboards.
#86. Make up a fictitious tale about how you went to rebuild Maraqua, got confronted by Dr. Sloth, beat him and his army, and then made friends with a Sea Slorg. You may get questioned how Dr. Sloth is there when he attempts to take over Neopia again, but hey, it'll be good while it lasts!
#85. Train your pets until they're the strongest ever.
#84. Start vandalizing places with "CHET FLASH WUZ HERE! THIZ WAS MADE BY (YOUR SCREENAME)". Nobody ever said it was bad to be villainous... right? RIGHT!?!
#83. Kidnap famous Neopians and hold them hostage until they tell you their secrets.
#82. Invade the Neopets offices and command Adam and Donna to add your screenname to the 'News' page for being the 'best Neopian ever'.
#81. Pretend you're famous. It's not the real thing, but hey, at least your ego will be boosted! I think.
#80. Play games constantly until you get a high score; you'll get neomails, trust me.
#79. Neomail random people in chatspeak, 1337 or something else like that, and eventually, you'll be tagged 'the irritating n00b with no literacy'. I mean, it's not the best way to be famous, but it's still pretty cool!
#78. Hire your own personal bodyguard and walk around Neopia with them hovering over you. Others will assume your famous, as most normal citizens don't have their own bodyguards.
#77. Become a ruthless, scheming villain and announce that you're planning to take over Neopia. It might bring you a tad bit of fame. Only problem is everybody whose a hero//talking pickle etcetera will be looking for you.
#76. Become one of those pets/owners that has a job as a mascot for a certain store. Walking around in that burger scented suit all day could make you real popular with hungry stray Puppyblews looking for a meal.
#75. Rob the National Neopian bank, with no disguise, in broad daylight. This basically guarantees you to land on the front page of the Neopian Times... and get arrested.
#74. Write a made up autobiography on your life, make millions of copies, sneak them into the book shop, and wait for everybody - even strangers - to come to your Neohome in tears saying how strong you were and how well you've handled all the tragic events in your life.
#73. I don't know - just become famous... somehow!???!
#72. Set a Neopian record - like the most loafs of bread consumed in an hour, or how many times you jumped from atop of Virtupets and lived. I'd recommend the first one over the last.
#71. Scribble out your autograph and hand it to random people.
#70. Go with the thing you're talented at. Hey, it's so crazy it just might work.
#69. Have really strong pets.
#68. Darn, I had an idea for this one but I lost it...
#67. Oh yeah. Have loads of trophies.
#66. Join a guild and be active. You won't be *that* famous, but you're on your way.
#65. One word. Namedrop. Or is that two?
#64. Have a shop sized 192018482... if they make them that big.
#63. Win the poetry competition every week for three years. Or just once. Whatever.
#62. Paint all your pets invisible, all the petpets invisible, and eat invisible food mwahahaha. Then you'll look crazy when you're talking to them and eating!
#61. Have a very large and expensive neohome.
#60. Throw a giant party at the mentioned neohome. Oh, and invite Joey and Chocolate.
#59. Win site spotlight.
#58. Work on the Neoteam. This is a guaranteed one.
#57. Display a bunch of expensive and rare items in the trading post. You'll be "popular" in no time.
#56. Constantly enter your pet in contests. You're bound to win one day.
#55. Rob a cheese factory.
#54. Paint your Neohome BRIGHT red or yellow. It might not make you famous, but it could attract some attention I suppose.
#53. Become famous from being a world-class klutz.
#52. Invent Neopia's first bottle of ketchup.
#51. Donate all your items to the Money Tree.
#50. Make a band and perform at the Tyrannian Concert Hall. Make sure to stage dive when nobody's paying attention!
#49. Date Dr. Sloth or Fyora or somebody equally desirable.
#48. Discover the Negg Faerie's name.
#47. Buy all the items from Mika and Carassa's garage sale so that they can MOVE ALREADY!!!
#46. Make a giant piece of cheese. Everybody will flock to your house for a piece and you'll get heaps of media coverage!
#45. Win the Test Your Strength Jackpot. Try heaving an anvil onto it!
#44. Force the Neoteam to dedicate a day to you. Make them invent items in your name, and then give them their asparagus back.
#43. Set all the pets in the Pound free!
#42. Win the caption competition.
#41. Make a statue in honour of a hated neovillain. Put it up outside your neohome. Hey, you can even use the eggs they throw at you to bake a cake!
#40. Find out where the heck they're hiding neoschools!
#39. Win the gallery spotlight with just one item in your shop.
#38. Walk around wearing step-out-shoes. Guaranteed to cause an impact.
#37. Win the Plushie Tycoon game.
#36.
#35. Figure out what happened to #36. I swear it was there a moment ago... creepy!
#34. Sky dive from a tower of turnips. Make sure there's a lot of media coverage there!
#33. Become famous for being the first Neopian Times author that ISN'T insane.
#32. Eat some cheese. Umm... maybe if you eat a lot... people might notice...
#31. Get Donna to admit that JELLY WORLD EXISTS!
#30. Wait... scratch that... there's no such thing as Jelly World! What was I thinking?!
#29. Get so many trophies that the scroll button on your user lookup is so long that you have to invent a catchy tune about it.
#28. If you're an owner, just live through your pet!
#27. Win the first petpetpet spotlight.
#26. Win the storytelling contest.
#25. Get everybody else in Neopia frozen, so you're the only user. You'll have no competition! And nobody to worship your famousness either L
#24. Make your pet win a book award.
#23. Force feed your pet so much gourmet food that they explode. Or win a trophy at the Gourmet Club. Whatever.
#22. Steal somebody's image in the Beauty Contest. Don't you love the hatemail and prospect of frozen-ness?!
#21. Say "Oh Piffle" a lot. Hey, it's worked for some...
#20. Win that Smuggler's Cove thingy.
#19. Walk around asking people how to get famous.
#18. It's really hard to do a list like this without repeating yourself...
#17. Draw a really nifty piece of artwork that ensures your pet first place in the Beauty Contest.
#16. Win a load of battles in the Battledome.
#15. Advertise free fish neggs. Even if you don't have any, you'll be famous before you can say Chet Flash!
#14. Have a Draik egg in your shop.
#13. Put [neomail is closed] somewhere on your lookup. This will ensure that you get dozens of neomails a day.
#12. Dress as your faerie of choice. This works even better if you're a male.
#11. Own a really confused Meerca.
#10. Or just walk around wearing lucky green boots.
#9. Rig the games somehow so you get the top score in every one.
#8. Make a fan club in honour of White Weewoos.
#7. Once everybody joins above fan club (which they will), let them all know how awesome you are.
#6. Declare that a rock is a petpet, and take it for walks. People will stare, but you want that, right?
#5. Name your pet after the exact username of somebody already famous. People will find you when they try to lookup him/her.
#4. Claim that you hate Weewoos. Controversy!
#3. Use reverse psychology. Tell the world that you don't WANT to be famous, and you probably will be.
#2. Be one of the authors writing this article.
#1. And if all else fails... learn to enjoy your invisibility.

Well, there you go! Some of those ideas must work. Now I've gotta go and find out what in the name of Fyora happened to #36.

DISCLAIMER: I would not actually suggest using many of these ideas. Carrie and I take no responsibility for personal injuries or angry Weewoo lovers as a result of testing these methods. That being said, good luck getting famous!