Show Off Your Pet! But First, Rate My Lookup?

Let’s scan the events of the past few months and see how they rated on the Neoboard excitability meter. The site layout was revamped -- definitely a huge thrill for many of us! Wearable clothes came out -- definitely the answer to many Neopians’ prayers! And the Neopian Pound? TNT said it would be back better than ever, so try to control your excitement, my fervent Neopians!

In the meantime, why don’t you scoot yourself over to the Neoboard Index and join the laughter already in progress? I dissolve into giggles at least a dozen times a day there -- so will you!

Here are some of the most recent and most popular Neoboard topics, starting with the biggest, the rowdiest, the most “faboo” board topic of them all!

Show Off Your Pet! (Customisation Board)

This board topic is for people who like to dress up their pets in delightful clothing combinations and show them off! My personal favorite would be the Malevolent Sentient Poogle Plushie dressed up in a Pretty Pink Flower Hat. It’s surprisingly attractive for a Malevolent Sentient... well, you know!

And come on, we’ve all stuffed our Neopets into an Ultra Fashionable Potato Sack at one time or another, just to see how they looked. And didn’t they all look weirdly cool?

The same goes for all those other customisable clothes. Sure, some pets look geekier than others in Spectacles of Perception (my own goggly-eyed Kau included), and that Squid Hat won’t garner you any beauty points, but doesn’t that Explorer Backpack make everyone’s pet look like a winner?

I just have one question: why did those sadistic artists at Neopets Headquarters release the Winter Blechy Hat in the middle of SUMMER? Evil Sloth plan? Random eccentricity? The irrepressible need to see the Blechy petpet chewing away at our precious Neopets’ BRAINS, like the smallest and cutest of pixilated tumors? How... precious. (NOT REALLY.)

And did they really think we wouldn’t be sadistic enough to clap a warm toothy hat onto each and every pet as soon as we could get our grubby little hands on them? Even for the Snow pets, who were having a hard enough time holding themselves together in the summer heat? They. Thought. WRONG. -evil grin-

Lending MSPP! (Help Board, Avatar Board)

The MSPP (TCG) is one thing, and the Malevolent Sentient Poogle Plushie is another. One is a harmless Collectible Trading Card, and the other is a vicious and mean-spirited Plushie Poogle who wants to invade your Neohome and scare the living daylights out of your poor Neopet. When you see someone trying to lend an “MSPP,” my astonished readers, you can be sure that they are talking about the Card, not the Poogle!

Really, why would anyone want to borrow an evil Poogle? Isn’t basic Neopet maintenance hard enough, what with Neezles, Sneezles and Lumps going around, without inviting a dastardly fabric-patched plushie with malicious intent into your Neopets’ lives?

From the Trading Card:

Mummy... Poogly just made a funny noise!

Shh, dear, it is nothing. Go back to sleep.

Rate My Lookup? (Help Board)

One of the older, but always trendy, Neoboard topics around is the “Rate My Lookup?” board topic. Veterans and newbies alike converge here to ask for coding advice and to compare graphics, CSS codes, and music codes. The standard practice is to give the user lookup a rating between 0 to 10, such as “9/10.” A few enthusiastic posters might even go far as to rate “1000/10” or “infinity/10.” Here are some the ratings I use myself:

- *tastes user lookup* Needs more salt. Otherwise, 10/10!

- *touches user lookup* So shiny! But did you lather, rinse and repeat?

- I’m sorry, I think I heard you saying something but your lookup is far too loud...

- *sniffs user lookup* Needs more pink #F52887. Otherwise, great job!

So are you tired of your basic Neopets user lookup? Find a “Rate My Lookup” board topic and get hooked up with the custom user lookup maker of your dreams! There are always a dozen of them around, sharing ideas and passing around graphics artist references. I’ve gotten plenty of advice there myself, and I’m quite proud of my own personally coded lookup!

Be sure to get permission from people before copying their codes, though! Stealing graphics and code from another user is a reportable offense, and you’ll get in trouble from TNT for having sticky fingers.

I Love NC Mall! / I Hate NC Mall! (NC Mall)

The hottest trend on this brand new Neoboard seems to be either slavishly adoring NC Mall for its amazing variety of items, or hating it for its use of real life cash. Some wonderfully manic users have managed to do both, and you can too! Just make a board topic and start arguing with yourself -- it's always good for a laugh, and dozens of users are always eager to join in the hilarity!

You: The items are amazingly cool! I would give anything for that “Groovy Disco Ball!”

You: I can’t believe they’re asking for real cash! I would give anything for that “Down With NC Flag!”

You: They’re so incredibly witty at TNT Headquarters! I would give anything for that “Barrel of TNT!”

You: I hate the whole concept. I would give anything for that “Barrel of TNT!”

Face it: either way, you’re salivating over the merchandise. That’s why trying on items at NC Mall is so much fun! Having the opportunity to dress my pets in ten minutes of borrowed splendor is just as fun as saving towards that coveted Paint Brush -- and I can change my options when I get bored! Don’t you think that having the opportunity to try on merchandise for free is better than nothing at all? I certainly do!

Speaking of personal choice, here are some ultra-new Neoboard topics I’ve just “discovered.” You’ll find out just how new in a second... -sly wink-

Neohome hide and seek! (Roleplaying?)

It’s a terrific game to play on the boards! It’s fresh! It’s fun! It... doesn’t exist anywhere except in my own mind! -cheeky grin-

I came up with the idea while playing Kacheek Seek. Wouldn’t it be fun if someone with a terrific, well-furnished Neohome could host a game of hide and seek within its walls? All the host would need to hint at is whether the Neopet is “over,” “under,” or “inside” a certain furniture object or Neohome structure. For example:

Host: My Neopet is hungry, and whenever it’s hungry, it sits next to yummy things. What is it sitting next to?

Player 1: Obviously the Neopet is somewhere in the kitchen.

Player 2: What about the bedroom, though? It’s full of Biscuit furniture.

Player 3: Is the Neopet sitting next to the Sweet Scented Centerpiece on the Amber Coral Coffee Table in the northeast corner of the Maraquan-themed living room?

Host: You’re absolutely correct, Player 3!

Player 3: Wow! It’s almost as though I were some imaginary participant planted here just to prove that this game can be tremendously easy and fun to play!

-high fives you all-

-vanishes into the ether-

Show Off Your Hideous Pet! (Customisation Board?)

It’s weird! It’s original! It... also exists only in my mind! -wry smile-

I came up with the idea while putting Christmas duds on my Tyrannian Flotsam. Yes, I was trying to “soften her up.” And if you’ve ever been startled by the sight of a holiday pet with fangs engulfing half her face, well, let’s just say I feel your pain.

So, wouldn’t it be nice to get kudos for having the most hideously dressed Neopet? That hodgepodge of clothing in your closet would finally be useful! How about a Purple Feather Boa and Blumaroo Jester Shirt for your mutant Blumaroo? Or a Chocolate Kacheek Hat and Halloween Kacheek Screws for your Faerie Kacheek? The possibilities are endless... unfortunately!

The End

This was my latest installment of the hottest Neoboard trends (with a few of my own suggestions thrown in!). I hope you were inspired to visit some new sections of the Neoboard Index that you’ve never visited before, and that you find them to be a lot more fun than you expected!

See you again when I track the next wave of Neopets site content changes, and good luck, as usual, with all your Neo-endeavors both on and off the boards!