Dr. Frank Sloth's Dance Party

     I had a very strange day today. After the recent Virtupets Yooyuball Cup win, I decided to take a little holiday to the Virtupets Space Station. I had heard that the place had been remodeled since the last time I had taken a visit back in Year 7 on business. The place looked fantastic! Last time I visited, there were bits of slime all about the walls and poorly disguised Sloth minions running around with scissors (which is terribly dangerous, let me tell you!). But the place is really quite lovely now; definitely worth the neopoints I spent to take a spaceship out to visit it.

     After walking around for a bit, I made my way to the Recreation Deck and decided I would sample some of Virtupets's fine cuisine at the Grundo Cafe. As I hear a health code has now been added to the space station, the counters looked very sanitary and I believe the Grundo waiter had washed his hands after using the restroom, which is always a plus. I ordered my favorite, Space Rocks, and when the Grundo went off to the kitchen to make some, I spotted a strange looking door behind the counter.

     I'm really a very naturally curious person; this isn't something I can help, it's just the way I am. So when I saw that door, I simply had to investigate, I can’t turn down an adventure! I wiggled a bit in my stool and grabbed an eye full of the strange door as well as the strange sign taped onto it. It appeared to be written crudely in green crayon and it said “NOT A SECRET LAIR” in terrible handwriting. As someone who has traversed the highest hills of Terror Mountain to the deepest ruins of Maraqua, I have grown wise to trickery, and knew that something fishy was going on. I scanned the room to make sure no one was watching, and before I could stop myself, I darted behind the counter and in through the door.

     Looking back on it, that probably wasn't a very good move. Although Virtupets has been remodeled and doesn't appear very outwardly nefarious, it's not wise to simply go busting through doors and sticking your nose where it doesn't belong. But one must remember that I am a professional! I have done and seen things the average Neopian would never dream of; I have the credentials to bust open doors and stick my nose where it doesn't belong!

     I'm getting off track. Anyway, so I walked through the door—which for some reason wasn't locked—and found myself in a spooky-looking hallway. And not just your average spooky; this place would give Edna a run for her money. It was barely light enough for me to see, but I could barely make out a trail of petpets that I couldn't identify making their way across the floor with determined looks on their faces. They were carrying on their backs what looked like party supplies. All this only fueled my intrigue and I gingerly made my way across the dark corridor so as not to draw attention to myself. Well, not really gingerly; I was actually running down the hall and swinging my arms around wildly. It really seemed like the thing to do at the time, but I probably startled quite a few petpets.

     After ten minutes at this, I began to see a faint light at the end of hall and I heard the distant sound of music. I felt a twinge of fear as I began to imagine what might be at the end of the tunnel. Perhaps a revival of minions planning their evil plans to bring back Sloth? Maybe it was Sloth himself! So I did what any sensible person would do and continued down the hall to investigate further.

     I began to realize that the lights at the end of the tunnel were not just any lights, they were multi-colored strobe lights. And the music I had heard? It was dance music. Was there a party going on in there?

     Well, you know me; I can't hold myself back when there is a party going on! I skipped my way down the rest of the hallway until I could finally see what exactly was going on and what I saw I don't think I will ever forget. There was a big, neon sign above my head that read “Dr. Frank Sloth's Dance Hall” and this dance hall was currently holding host to the largest, greenest party I had ever seen. There appeared to be some sort of mosh pit of excited minions throwing a Mutant Yooyuball around and in the middle of this mess of a party were the Virtupets Yooyuball team all looking extremely apprehensive and frightened by their current surroundings. The only team member who seemed to be having a good time was the robot goalkeeper, Goltron MK I, who perhaps could not process the situation and the eminent danger they were in.

     Suddenly, the music cut out and a loud, ghastly squeak came from over the speakers which made everyone in the room flinch. “Sorry about that!” came a grand, disembodied voice. “I had to get your attention somehow!” I looked around the room to find the source of the voice and nearly fell to the floor when I saw him. Standing 6'3", with gross green skin and a menacing black cloak, was the terror of Neopia, Dr. Frank Sloth. There he was, standing at a podium, addressing his adoring fans with a jeweled microphone in hand. Frankly (pun intended), he didn't appear to be very insane or evil. In fact, he looked like a pretty cool guy.

     “If I can have everyone’s attention please, I would like to propose a toast!” Sloth raised his glass of green liquid, which appeared to have something swimming in it. “To the greatest Yooyuball team in all of Neopia, Virtupets!” Everyone took a sip of their drink, and he continued, “You know, I was a player myself, once. I was kicked off the team when I suggested that I be captain of the team and we enslave all of Neopia.” The minions all booed. “Oh, no need to rehash old memories!” shouted the doctor, throwing his arms around gleefully. “Tonight is a night to celebrate!”

     And before you could say “evil Neopian overload”, an army of Neopian Defenders came bursting into the dance hall, weapons drawn. They had found their way to the secret dance hall from the very entrance which I had taken only a few minutes prior. It appears I had forgotten to close the day behind me.

     I took this as my cue to leave, seeing as the Neopian Defenders and I haven’t been on very good terms since the “incident”. I sidestepped out of the dance hall just before the fighting broke out and tiptoed my way back through the passageway. I found my way back in the Grundo Cafe, grabbed my Space Rocks which the chef had so kindly left out and re-chilled for me and began my long journey back to Neopia.

     I think I’m going to root for Krawk Island next year...

The End