How to Care for Your Yooyu

With a desperate shrill scream- which clearly showed my bravado and my heroic deeds- I dived through the rainbow, charged through the tumultuous fray of desperate poor Neopians, scaled the Food Shop, taking a bite out of the burger which actually turned out to be brick, and fell off headfirst into a nearby bush. This is how my usual shopping day unfolds. As I got back to my feet, I attracted the attention of a few surprised shoppers, but I ignored them. In my typical running crouch posture I arrived at the petpet shop, stared daggers at the buzzer perched at the top, (I'm sure he's evil), tapped eight times on the door (my secret knock), and making sure no one was following me, I dived into the shop.

Some may call me paranoid. Some may call me crazy. These people don't know the terrible truth.

I, my cherished readers, had purchased a Yooyu from the Altador Cup Prize Shop. This petpet is beastly. This petpet is so full of pure evil many have run screaming from its malignant glare. I know this because I saw a picture of it in a magazine I read. Magazines don't lie. This was why I had swiftly gone to the Petpet shop. I was going to need some serious supplies and items to restrain this critter from ripping me apart.

So, after two hours of hard bargaining and the occasional clouting from enraged security guards, I marched triumphantly into my Neohome. I threw my hat onto my coat stand, threw my coat onto my hat stand and marched straight to the kitchen, which in fact turned out to be the lounge, and stared at my Gnorbu, Alachohol.

"Oh, you're back then!" Alachohol said cheerfully. I swiftly scanned the room with my eyes, making sure the predatory petpet wasn't nearby. I immediately hurled my petpet supplies onto the carpet. Alachohol eyed it sceptically.

"I told you to get some carrots."

"Silence, fool!" I roared. I could sense it approaching. I ripped a large lengthy piece of pipe out from the pile, ready to wield when the thing attacked me.

"Look," Alachohol groaned wearily, "it's not pure evil."

"But the magazine-"

"Showed a picture of a very nice Yooyu."

"With the intentions to rip me apart and destroy my Neohome."

"I'll tell you what, I'll show you exactly how to look after it, and if he shows any signs of demonic behaviour, pure evilness, signs of nasty intentions or bookmark stealing, I'll let you deal with him. Okay?"

I didn't know what to say. I was hungry.

1) Walking your Yooyu

(Note: The following sections on caring for your Yooyu are written by Alachohol. I apologise for any of my owner's shenanigans, but he insisted on being a part of this.)

The first thing your Yooyu will want to do is get out and exercise. This is a petpet that's been trained to exercise for one of the most strenuous physical feats ever performed in Neopia. My Yooyu- Mr Pickles- was practically bouncing off the walls when I took him home. I immediately took him to the park, where he immediately curled up into a ball and shot off into the distance, leaving a spray of mud and gravel. Mr Pickles wasn't keen on the average humdrum games like Fetch, but instead wanted to play 'Spot the Invertebrates' and 'Identify the different types of moss'.

I was incredibly surprised that a Yooyu is not only a brilliant candidate for exercise and long walks, but also had about as much brain power as me.

My owner grumbled a bit and went to the Food Shop.

2) Cleanliness

Your Yooyu will want to stay clean to stay proud and happy with its appearance. These petpets are used to being in the spotlight and insist that you buy special types of moisturiser and soap that can tend to their shiny large scale-like segments. You'll need to scrub each brown segment until they shine, and you need to make sure your Yooyu's nails aren't too long. If they grow too much, they'll almost certainly catch on something as your Yooyu energetically rushes around, which you need to avoid.

3) Happiness

Yooyus are pretty bouncy, in both senses, but you still need to be aware of what will make your Yooyu cheerful and what will make them sad. I found that Mr Pickles was incredibly happy in the sunshine, but utterly despised rain. Mr Pickles also wasn't interested in plushies, but enjoyed testing his mettle against the Petpet scratching post I bought him. He was less pleased with the pit of spikes my owner had bought for him, which I quickly removed. Keeping a Yooyu happy is simple, as all they need are a small variety of supplies and loving attention.

4) Socialising

This is when I realised that Yooyus could be quite vain creatures. Sure, Mr Pickles was happy with his food and toys, but wasn't satisfied without any other petpets to play with and befriend. I had to take him to another pet so he could play with his abominable snowball. Mr Pickles wasn't bothered with the abominable snowball's lack of conversation- he just wanted to show off.

5) Feeding

This is perhaps the most important thing you need to get right to keep your Yooyu happy and well. To be blunt, Yooyus will eat anything, as my owner proved my feeding Mr Pickles some sun cream lotion, insisting that it had wanted some. I settled on a healthy diet of vegetables that Mr Pickles cherished. He's developed a slight craving for carrots, and when he's been good I reward him with the occasional chocolate to give him the bursts of energy he needs. If you keep to this tight schedule your Yooyu should be satisfied with what it eats, and you shouldn't have many problems.

This guide may be short, but you'll quickly find it contains all you need to know. Remember, whatever species your petpet is, it will have a unique personality that you will need to attend to at all times. Yooyus are special creatures, and you'll need to have an exact plan of when you'll take it for walks, when you'll feed it and when you'll clean it. Over time, you'll become a distinguished Yooyu owner, an amazing feat considering these petpets are energetic, fickle and remarkably intelligent.