Roasty Toasty: The Best Neopian Coffees

Adventurer, Journalist, and Author Extraordinaire

The Coffee Cave, Roo Island – There are many beneficial factors that weigh a Neopian's opinion when drinking coffee: weight loss, improved cognitive function, heightened energy levels, and increased emotional happiness.

Whether you are gearing up for your heroic battle against the Snowager, or adding the last punctuation revisions to your twelve part adventure series, coffee is the best drink for you. "Okay," you say to yourself. "Now that I understand all the benefits of coffee, where do I get it?" Well, fine Neopian, you get it right at the Coffee Cave, now conveniently located on Roo Island for all the exhausted artists on the east coast of the island. To aid you in your personal discovery, I, Jadriar, have compiled a list of the best coffees for your tasting convenience.

Weevil Coffee

The Coffee Cave makes this delicious drink with chamomile, spices, and their special key ingredient, weevils. My colleague and fellow coffee drinker, Biasha, had this to say about Weevil Coffee, "I love the spicy aftertaste and strange texture that the weevils leave in my mouth. I find this coffee enjoyable and affordable." I, as a journalist, enjoy this coffee because of the tasty hints of spice and wonderful whipped cream topping. And how affordable it is. Upon discussion with the owner of Coffee Cave, this drink can be purchased for approximately three hundred Neopoints, unless of course, you wish to haggle with her. An artist has to save every Neopoint, after all.

Spiced Pumpkin Coffee

I highly recommend the Spiced Pumpkin Coffee as these summer months come to an end and the Months of Gathering and Collecting blow upon us. The simplicity of the ingredients makes this coffee a frugal one Neopoint: freshly brewed coffee with simmered spices and a splash of pumpkin juice. The Coffee Cave stated, "We brew extra strong coffee beans specifically for this coffee. Therefore, when we simmer the spices in the coffee there is a perfect balance between the warm spices and the brew itself. In addition, we add the pumpkin juice last—right before we stick a cute little straw in the cup for you."

Candy Pumpkin Latte

Are you now thinking of other autumn favorites to diversify your beverage menu for the autumn months? Add Candy Pumpkin Latte to your list. This latte is brewed with steamed milk and a shot of original coffee making for a simplistic liquid. However, while the latte itself may be bare, the delicacies that decorate this seasonal must-have are extraordinary. After carefully spooning a mountain of cream over the latte, the Coffee Cave then sprinkles cinnamon on the top and pokes two small candy pumpkins in the cream. "While this latte may be more on the expensive side of three thousand Neopoints," said the shopkeeper, "it is the perfect comforting beverage for a blustery fall night."

Orange and Mango Coffee

While tasting many of the Coffee Caves different brews, the shopkeeper recommended that I taste the Orange and Mango Coffee. "I wished to contribute to the artistic atmosphere of the Eastern Coast," the shopkeeper explained. "Therefore I created this original coffee. It is only brewed at the Coffee Cave." What makes this coffee brilliant includes the substitution of milk for mango-orange juice. This adds a fruity mix-up to your typical creamy coffee. This coffee goes great with the summer months due to the citrus nature. If the weather is a little to hot for a steaming cup of coffee, then ask one of the employees of the Coffee Cave to pour it over ice and-Whoolah! A cool coffee drink.

Meridellian Blend Coffee

The Meridellian Blend Coffee is a simplistic, cultural, masterpiece. An original coffee brew, served in a cup resembling the castle tower and banner of Meridell. Furthermore, this cup of coffee has a little extra for the Neopian who needs a little sunshine in his or her life; a mini Meridell flag to stir your cream and sugar in! "My husband and I once took a vacation to Meridell to enjoy the fresh country air," said the shopkeeper. "When I was there I became fascinated with the guileless lives of the farmers. They wore plain garb that lacked any bedazzlements, silks, or laces. I decided I would create a coffee as simple as the farmers. To boost the authenticity of the brew, we even spent the extra Neopoints to ship Meridellian coffee beans to Roo Island!"

Krakuberry Mocha

"This is another one of our customer's fruity favorites," said one of the Coffee Cave's seasonal employees. The Kraku Berries used to make this special brew are found on the shores of Neopia. They are then dehydrated, ground into fine powder and roasted alongside the coffee beans to add the slightest hint of fruity flavor. This coffee has an extra special bonus; a small spoonful of mocha spread across the bottom of the ceramic cup. The shopkeeper informed me that, "this thin layer of chocolate gives our customers a sweet little surprise to alleviate their sadness when the coffee is gone. After all, chocolate elevates any downtrodden mood."

Decaf Darigan Coffee

If bedtime creeps upon you but you crave a warming brew, then Decaf Darigan Coffee is highly recommended. "We always try and keep a pot of decaf hot for the artists who are travelling home after a late night at the Poetry Contest. The Neopians are always appreciative for a warm drink before they rest and they always tip well," said one of the shop's employees. It was no surprise when I heard that the Decaf Darigan Coffee was brewed with extra dark coffee beans. The coffee was so dark, I swore there were black – or maybe it was purple – swirls in it. I therefore asked the shopkeeper who orders the Decaf Darigan Coffee the most. "Oh, this coffee is not just for evil minions. Ironically, many Brightvalians choose our decaf. They tend to lecture me about the energy heighteners in coffee and about how intellectuals occasionally need a good night's sleep instead of an all-night research session."

Herbal Coffee

One of the most consumed coffees on Roo Island, Herbal Coffee was voted the number two must have in the Roo Island brochure. After personally consuming this wonderful delicacy, I had to ask the Coffee Cave's shopkeeper what inspired this brilliant idea. "Well, it was quite simple," the shopkeeper told me. "I figured, if there was herbal tea, why not herbal coffee?" This coffee is first made with freshly ground coffee beans. Next, several herbs are seeped in a brewing pot of coffee. "The trick was making sure the mint and other ingredients didn't clump up and pour into the customer's cup," said the shopkeeper. "My husband actually constructed a special insert for one of my coffee pots so that the leaves remained in the pot and not the customer's mug."

Ultra Strong Coffee

"This coffee is for those who are addicted to the taste of strongly roasted coffee beans," said the shopkeeper. The beans are imported only from the finest plantations in Neopia. We then roast the coffee beans until the seeds have a shiny black liquor, which helps to create the infamous bittersweet flavors. Even though I was warned of the intense flavor, I still had my socks knocked off me when I tried this coffee. First the liquid poured into my mug black as a shadow Shoyru. Then, when I finally took a sip, pow, my taste buds were assaulted by a coffee so strong and so delicious I actually ordered a second cup. "This coffee is great for our picky drinkers," said one of the Coffee Cave's employees as she poured me another cup of coffee. "A lot of Neopians will only drink or eat gourmet delicacies, so this satisfies those types of customers."

This list compiles the best coffees around Neopia. If you are ever on Roo Island visiting a poetry competition or just checking in with King Roo, be sure to stop by the Coffee Cave and have some of the delicious coffees they have to offer.

Special thanks to Carolyn and the rest of JCW for the constant support and the constant happiness they bring into my life.