The Mysterious Allure of the Rubbish Dump

     It goes without saying that the Rubbish Dump is not an especially pleasant place to be. It's a pungent sort of venue, due to the great amount of detritus and, well, the sheer magnitude of discarded dung. Common sights are bits of broken cutlery, the remains of meals great and small, and papers and bottles that likely should have gone into recycling (tsk tsk!). Even worse, digging into the great heap of waste can prove a perilous affair. Trimmings from barbed wire fences threaten to poke probing fingers, and rogue zeenana peels menace even the most experienced traveler with their comically slippery undersides.

     Why, then, are so many Neopians drawn to the stinking heap?

     There is, of course, the possibility of finding an accidental toss. Most Meridell denizens use the area to be rid of farm and household wastes. These items are fiercely nibbled at best, and laying in dung-covered shards at worst. One might even see refuse quite neatly packed in small bags to avoid the spread of the great heap. That doesn't mean that every item left at the Dump was intentionally left there, however.

     Who hasn't had their kadoatie knock objects off of their tables and shelves? Who hasn't seen a doglefox sprinting away from its owner with a mouth full of who-knows-what? Perhaps these battered items happened to fall directly into the trash bin. Perhaps an unwitting passerby came across a petpet's secret stash and mistook it for garbage. Whatever the reason, objects that aren't trash at all do, occasionally, fall into the grubby hands of the Rubbish Dump out of sight of the hard-working Kacheek that cares for the land.

     There have been frequent sightings of rather valuable "trash" buried in the mounds of repulsive offal. One Neopian claimed to have seen several codestones, a bottled faerie, and even a deeply confused Whinny amongst the debris, the latter of which had run away far too quickly for this Neopian to capture. During the investigation, it has been discovered that simply seeing these costly and/or conscious throw-aways is the most common experience. Collecting these castoff blessings is a heavily competitive sport, and one rarely won.

     Some of those gathered around the Dump on the day of investigation were willing to offer their feedback as to how best prepare for this friendly rivalry, though they often did so without removing their eyes from the stinking mound before them. The collected tips are as follows:

     1.) Wear gloves. The aforementioned barbed wire and rotten fruit and veg aren't things you'd want poking your palms or squishing between your fingers. It's quite a nasty location, after all, and nobody wants to acquire a case of Floppy Tongue or the Hoochie Coochies while rubbish diving. Gloves do, however, cause some loss of dexterity when actually grabbing the desired junk (or, for the lucky, non-junk).

     2.) Plan for the whole day. Reasonably enough, most of the items at the Rubbish Dump are rubbish. In fact, the broad and vast majority are things not even worthy of the Money Tree, expect perhaps to fertilize it. One might see a sparkle amongst the slop once every few hours on one's own side of the heap, so it is probably best to not have anything else planned for the daytime hours.

     3.) Limber up. Some suggest taking agility lessons at the Island Training School to help with speed and flexibility when it comes to beating others to the special items that appear every so often. (Author's note: one of the Neopians promoting this tip abruptly stopped speaking to strike at the dirt and came out with something a bit odd: an unchewed ball of dung chewing gum. Nearby locals "ooh"ed and "aah"d that it might well have been left by the legendary Dung Faerie, and so the respondent begrudgingly tucked it into their bag.)

     4.) Train your eyes! As exemplified in the experience of the gum-toting Neopian above, speed is not the only useful skill to have when battling for rare items at the Dump. You must be able to tell the treasure from the trash, the cache from the chaff. A squished tomato smeared on an empty Krawkade bottle might look a lot like a fire faerie to the untrained eye. A codestone may appear to be a lump of Meridell's specialty: dung. One must be sharp-eyed to even see the special scraps that may tumble into the trash unawares.

     5.) Menthol-Scented Towels. Just trust me on this.

     In the end, though, if these special items are so rare, why would one even bother? It might cost a bit more to buy these items from the shops or seek them out on sandy beaches, but there's no risk of being spattered in garbage. The chances are perhaps even better simply sitting nearby the Money Tree. It's certainly less smelly there, and with the fresh air and friendly company, why would anyone choose the Rubbish Dump?

     There is, it seems, something more.

     Several Neopians, appearing alternately exhausted and hyped-up on Super Energy Blast, spoke of something called an "Avitar." This author asked if perhaps it had something to do with Avibots or Lutari Island (or both), and was instantly the laughingstock of the simmering dungheap. When the amused masses were questioned, however, they seemed to struggle to explain the phenomenon themselves. Is it an item? No, not exactly. It's meant to be a display of achievement...but where? A badge? No. A crown? No. A novelty t-shirt? Also no. All agreed on one thing, however: they wanted it. They wanted it very, very badly.

     One tourist glared and grumbled something about a stranger snatching an apple core from a pile of unremarkable rotten leftovers. This chewed-fruit-bearing denizen had run off gibbering and laughing with dark bags under their eyes. This lucky Neopian had achieved the Avitar, the tourist said enviously. How an apple core can be intrinsically tied to such a lofty, intangible aspiration is beyond this author.

     So that is it, then. For so many Neopians, it is well worth the trouble for a few worthy items and the mysterious Avitar.

     In fact, this enterprise is so beloved, there is a particular day each month set aside for the celebration of the Rubbish Dump. On the first Saturday of every month, an even larger group of Neopians can be found dancing foot-to-foot on the edges of the smelly scene. Some set to work filling their bags with objective offal; the chewed bones and rotten fruit of everyday Meridell. Others pull garbage from the pile just to heave it back in. These sorts of contributors always seem to be cheering on the others, shouting encouragement about the Avitar. The most haggard of the group remain the scroungers and the seekers of the Avitar. On these days, it is said that the flow of rare treasure is quicker to Meridell. Some say it is due to this frenetic partnership of the accomplished and the aspirant. Others say that this day is blessed by the Dung Faerie.

     Whatever the reason is, one cannot deny that the Rubbish Dump holds a strange and powerful attraction for Neopians young and old alike. Even today, many gather around the heap of refuse seeking wealth, and seeking the Avitar.