Your Guide to Gifting with Pirate Pets

     You gather your pets and announce you're going shopping in the Marketplace. Cheers ensue. Your Valentine Kacheek dons his most festive hat; your Woodland Uni carefully counts her savings.

     "Get ready to go," you say to your Pirate Shoyru and Pirate Poogle. "We're going shopping!"

     "Why?" asks your Poogle.

     "To get gifts for the Day of Giving."

     Your Pirate Shoyru frowns. "But why would we want to do that?"

     You're stumped. "Because it's nice."

     "Pirates aren't nice," scoffs your Poogle.

     "Because it's fun?"

     "Digging up treasure would be more fun," says your Shoyru. "Or firing a cannon. Or scuttling a ship."

     You try one more time. "Because it's a social norm."

     Your Pirate pets laugh so hard, they're practically rolling on the floor. "Since when do pirates care about that?"

     "Just get ready," you say. "You're coming with the family, whether you like it or not."

     When you arrive in the marketplace, you ask what everyone wants to shop for.

     "Plushies," says your Silver Cybunny.

     "Books," says your Chocolate Xweetok.

     "Weapons!" cheers your Water Lutari.

     "Remember," you say, "we're shopping for each other, not ourselves. "

     "I want to shop for Joy Fun Pops," says your Shoyru.

     He's participating. Well, that's encouraging. "Joy Fun Pops will melt before the holidays," you explain gently.

     "Not if I eat them."

     You heave a sigh. He clearly didn't listen to anything you just said.

     "Yeah, Joy Fun Pops!" cheers your Poogle.

     "How about we shop for toys instead?"

     They consider this and agree.

     You go into a shop with an emo Usul shopkeeper that your Pirate pets love. You help your Shoyru choose a gift for your Poogle and your Poogle choose a gift for your Shoyru. But after you buy the toys, they refuse to give them up.

     "We have to wrap them and put them under the tree."

     "No!" says your Poogle. "I want to keep his gift for myself."

     "And I want to keep her gift for myself," says your Shoyru.

     "That's what pirates do!" they cry.

     The rest of the month goes like this. When you go caroling, your Pirate pets throw snowballs at Neohome doors and scream, "Incoming!"

     When you drink borovan by the fire, they fight over the Krawk Island Mug and break it, spilling steaming borovan on themselves.

     When you visit the Advent Calendar, they put your Poogle's Weewoo on Reina's head. Reina is not amused.

     And when you bring gifts to the neighbours, they try to hide them underneath their sweaters instead of giving them away.

     By the time the Day of Giving rolls around, you're frazzled, worn out, and definitely not in a holiday mood.

     Sound familiar? You're among hundreds of Neopet owners who struggle with this every holiday season. Pirate pets aren't known for their giving spirits. They're known for … well … the opposite. You might have to get creative to get your little pirates on board with the Day of Giving. Here are some go-to tips.

     1. Practice sharing

     Pirates are so bad at giving gifts because they aren't used to sharing. But that's easily fixed. Tell your Pirate pets to break out their Woolypapith Piggy Banks and let your other pets play with the treasures within.

     Be sure to supervise, though. Sharing makes Pirate pets nervous. Being nervous makes them pinchy. You get the idea.

     2. Find gifts in the Snowager's cave

     You may find that your Pirate pets are more excited about giving gifts if they can steal them first. Since you're not about to let them rob innocent Neopians, the solution is to snatch treasure from that humbuggy Snowager's hoard.

     If you decide to go this route, keep healing potions on hand. A lot of healing potions, particularly XXI and XXII. And also some backup presents, just in case your pets aren't successful in smuggling something out.

     3. Sing a shanty about giving

     Pirates love music almost as much as they love not giving anything away. With that in mind, why not dust off the Pan Pipes and compose a sea shanty about how wonderful this giving time of year is? Something like:

     Argh, argh,

     The Day of Giving's Fun

     Ahoy, ahoy,

     We give to everyone

     Avast, avast,

     Spread treasure near and far

     Yo ho, yo ho

     Don't bury it in a sandbar

     It might take a few drafts to think of something they love, but once you do, you're golden. You'd be surprised at what Pirate Neopets will do if the instructions come from a catchy song.

     5. Keep away from the glitter

     Pirates are more likely to hoard shiny things. So, instead of giving your best Neofriend a Stunning Silver Ring this month, consider giving them something plainer. Like a Cheesetacular Gift Basket. Or a Meepit.

     6. Shop on Krawk Island

     If you can convince your Pirate pets to dig up some of their buried treasure, you might find them in a buying mood. In that case, move your Day of Giving shopping to Krawk Island and buy all the gifts in Dubloons. Your Pirate pets will get a few things for themselves, but they'll be in such good moods that you might have more luck convincing them to pick out a gift or two.

     7. Pull rank

     If all else fails, remember that pirates always listen to their captain. Remind your Pirate pets that you are the owner; ergo, you are the captain. So they better listen to you. And that means giving that gift to the neighbours right now! And not pinching anybody on the way out! (Oops, too late.)

     But if nothing changes, and your little Pirate pets never get in the spirit of the season, you can show them the true meaning of the Day of Giving by giving them gifts (especially Joy Fun Pops).

     Good luck, and happy holidays! Enjoy the festivities. :)