Battledome Weapon Gag Gifts for Every Friend: Part 1

     While people get a chuckle out of flinging Grapes of Wrath at the adversaries, there are plenty more hilarious weapons to consider gifting your Neofriends - particularly those who may be total newcomers to the battledome! So here we present: 15 Battledome gag gift ideas for every type of Neofriend! And while our gift suggestions may not be able to muster the same KA-POW as a Seasonal Attack Pea, we believe some of these more overlooked weapons will surely bring a smile to your friends’ faces (or at least a good eye roll).

     1. Battle Potato - for the chef friend

     Every good chef needs top-notch ingredients. This beautiful, humble spud would be appreciated by chefs of all levels, who can use it to prepare potato chips or some classic mashed potatoes with gravy. Well, that would be the intention, until the Battle Potato reveals its true power: 7 earth icons. Though your friend sadly cannot cook a dish with it, they’ll appreciate this weapon that fully embodies their chef persona.

     2. Disgruntled Janitors Bucket & Mop - for the obsessively cleaning friend

     If you have a friend that gets irritated by even the tiniest speck of dust, then consider this Disgruntled Janitors Bucket & Mop as a gift. With one grand sweeping gesture, they’ll simultaneously clean their Neohome till it’s sparkly clean, while safeguarding their Neohome from thieves via the Bucket & Mop’s surprising attack abilities!

     3. Fluffy Cybunny Slippers - for the cutesy friend

     For your friend whose closet consists solely of cutesy pink clothing, these Fluffy Cybunny Slippers would fit right in! With large fluffy ears and a sweet face, the slippers look completely innocent and harmless. But not only are they perfect for keeping feet warm in the cold winter months - they can also protect Cybunnies from enemies, enabling them to put up a fight while still maintaining an undeniably kawaii exterior!

     4. Holiday Light String Lasso - for the friend who starts playing holiday music the day after Halloween

     Everyone has that friend who starts jamming to holiday music well before the Month of Celebrating. So what’s a better gift than something extra festive? The Holiday Light String Lasso may look like a simple string of shimmering lights, but look closely and it’s a loop with no end. Maybe it won’t be particularly useful for tree decoration purposes, but with its surprising battling capabilities it can certainly come in handy to lasso and catch the pesky Pant Devil when he performs his annual Rod of Supernova heist!

     5. Island Lei - for the party-loving friend

     Ain’t no party like a Tiki party! Perhaps your friend is the fun-loving social butterfly who hosts the best gatherings that bring everyone together. Well, why leave out those in the Battledome? This Island Lei can be thought of as a welcome gift for your friend to share with their opponent. Sure, it might hurt a little, but it’s just a friendly brawl!

     6. Kougra Brush - for the beauty trend followers

     Do you have a beauty-conscious Kougra friend? You know, the type who must be up-to-date with the latest grooming products? Perhaps they’d scrunch their face at the idea of even entering the battledome. After all, even the slightest tousle would tussle their perfectly styled mane out of place! Well, with a Kougra Brush, they can do double-duty - deal damage in style while proclaiming the latest beauty trends! It’s a way to ehrm, “educate” their opponents?

     7. Look a Hasee! - for the easily distracted friend

     If you have a friend that’s perfectly incapable of fighting in the battledome due to them forever getting distracted by colourful objects and shiny things, send them Look a Hasee! Now they can use their low attention span to their advantage, and in turn distract their opponents in battle!

     8. Mighty Vegan Cheese Log - for the health-conscious friend

     Power to the vegans! No pets may have been harmed in the making of this weapon…but who said no pets were harmed in using this weapon? No one will dare look down upon vegan cheese once getting whacked by this mighty log!

     9. Mystical Fish Lobber - for that friend who is forever at the Fishing Vortex

     “Hey, where’s our buddy?”

     “Oh, they’ve gone fishing.”

      Ah, there’s our fisherman pal, still chasing the hope to hook that catch of a lifetime at Ye Olde Fishing Vortex. Rumours seem to confirm that shiny Paint Brushes, Morphing Potions, and Transmogrification Potions can be fished out from somewhere in those depths. Despite your friend’s ability to remain undeterred by the impossibly stacked odds of reeling in such an elusive prize, you can’t help but notice their growing stash of throwaway junk. Well, why not put some of those spare fish and squid to use in the battledome? Let them unleash the Mystical Fish Lobber - splat those opponents until they’re buried beneath a pile of chum!

     10. Mystical Tea Pot of Doom - for the tea friend

     Careful, this tea is scalding hot! Your tea-loving friend (perhaps their name is Tavi) may be delighted to receive this Mystical Tea Pot. But, warn them that this tea pot is not for campfire relaxation or recovery. As a matter of fact, the tea that’s poured out of this pot is strong enough to pack a punch - literally. Tea party in the Battledome, anyone?

     11. Uncomfortably Large Rock of Pain - for the friend who dreams of having a Rock

     Every year, they desperately wish to receive a Rock for the holidays. They don’t specify which Rock, so you let your imagination fly wild… And behold, you present them with the biggest Rock you can find: the Uncomfortably Large Rock of Pain! Don’t let its bulky, clunky appearance fool you - it can unleash great power in battle! And surely, this massive destructive Rock can also be a Neopet’s new huge (mildly dangerous) Petpet friend… right??

     12. Volleyball on Fire - for the athletic friend

     Ready. Set. Spike! Your sporty, athletic friend may normally prefer a fun game of Mynci Beach Volleyball over the Battledome, but what if you were to gift them this Volleyball on Fire to spice things up? Raise the stakes of a regular match - let your friend show off just how fast they can serve this blazing volley right at their opponent in the arena!

     13. Wakey Wakey Juice - for the friend who constantly oversleeps

     Nothing irks you like the constantly oversleeping friend! You could give them a year-long supply of coffee, but that’s an uninteresting gift. What about this mysterious yellow brew instead? Made of the sweetest nectar from musical plants, the Wakey Wakey Juice guarantees whoever drinks it will instantly be awakened from the deepest sleep. What people don’t realize, however, is that the Juice simultaneously unleashes 5+ icons of attack! So, waking up AND putting up a fight? Multi-tasking at its finest.

     14. Weird Scarab - for the stamp collecting friend

      Stamp collectors of all ages would absolutely be thrilled to receive a brand new scarab for their album! That is, until they try to stick it into their stamp album, and it stubbornly does not stick. Rather, the angry scarab flies off the album page, unleashing several icons of destruction towards everyone in its vicinity! Your friend would get a good chuckle as they show off the exotic new scarab to fellow collector friends and it shocks them with a feisty attacking bite!

     15. White Aisha Ears - for the friend obsessed with customisations

     You’re thankful for your fashionista friend. You truly are, but maybe you want to just steer them away from the NC Mall for one second, say, as an intervention for the sake of their own wallets. And what better way to momentarily distract them than with a rare retired accessory? This pair of Aisha ears are cleverly disguised as a Battledome weapon!

     Wait, what - your friend is back at the NC Mall already? Oh well, you tried.

      We hope you found an amusing gift here for your Neofriend or for an upcoming holiday gift exchange! There were too many entertaining weapons to list here, so stay tuned for more Battledome weapon gag gift ideas coming up in a future issue. In the meantime, happy shopping! (And do beware of innocent-looking items you pick up as you shop - who knows if they’ll suddenly turn around and hit you in the face?!)