Slushie Slinging Mutant Slayer

      Screams from Garb, sounded more like a war cry. The mutant Grundo increased in size nearly 30%. Swollen muscles shattered the shackles constricting his limbs. His skin tone shifted from green to pink with blue spots all around, a result of the faerie essence, Sloth presumed. Garb grunted and flexed his shoulders. A powerful pair of wings sprouted from his back. "Remarkable!" Sloth boomed with surprise. "Well done, my servant. Now that your transformation is complete, I will have your stats analyzed." A Sloth Clone scanned Garb's body in seconds. "Evaluation complete", reported the robotic clone. "Health, Strength, Defense, and Movement have all reached maximum potential." The clone delivered the report in the same voice as the evil mastermind himself, only a bit more choppy. "And his Intelligence?", asked Dr. Sloth. "Intelligence...Dim-witted." Replied the clone. Dr. Sloth slapped his forehead in failure. The blast from the Transmogrification Ray caused inflammation around Garb's brain. Ever since, he has suffered from short-term memory lost.

      Luckily for the inhabitants of Neopia, Dr. Sloth's dream of enslaving all Neopets ended during his untimely fall by Mira, the Space Faerie, back in year 10. Til this day, the evil mastermind remains trapped within her magical token floating in space. Without their master's guidance, the Mutant Grundos and Garoo Elite, departed on separate paths. The barbaric tendencies of the mutants would never mix well with the orderly conduct of the Blumaroo elites. While Commander Garoo and his troops spent their time searching for the lost Space Faerie Token, Garb and the rest of the Mutant Grundos frittered away their days thieving like a gang of intergalactic space pirates. Not until recently did Garb find his purpose with Sloth out of the picture. He made it a mission to visit the Oracle and receive a boon. Only with the Oracles blessing, will Garb be able to obtain greater power.

      An ancient obelisk rested at the center of a dusty plain in Tyrannia. Six warring factions awaited the signal for battle. Some warriors of the Brute Squad gazed at the constellations, asking Torakor for protection in battle. While those in the Awakened looked to Hubrid Nox for safe passage to the afterlife, many just watched the sky to past the sight. It wasn't long before those with their chins up caught site of an unidentified flying object descending from the clouds. As the ship grew closer, so did the daunting humming of its engine increase. Dust around the plain picked up in every direction as the ship cleared a pathway to land. The entire army of mutant Grundos stormed down the ramp door the moment it swung open. "Attention, Skidgets! I am Garb, the Grundo leader. We have come to claim the obelisk! Let the battle begin!" The warriors united against the common enemy. Each faction displayed impeccable defensive tactics, but their efforts were futile. Once the Mutant Grundos had them surrounded, the fighters were backed into their comrades. The bulky green invaders closed in on the herd, snuffing out the last square inch of oxygen between them. Most warriors fainted under the sheer pressure of their squeeze. However, some members of the Order of the Red Erisim and many in the Awakened faction had ways of evading such a practical attack. They required a bit more "magic" and Garb was happy to oblige. Taking flight towards the center of the action, Garb displayed his greatest weapon. He positioned himself as if holding something heavy. Purple sparks began to emit from his right palm, forming a glowing energy ball. Those skilled in spells detected Dark Faerie magic as the source of Garb's power. "But, how can a mutant possess faerie abilities?" they wondered. "I am the beacon of Sloths creation!" Garb proclaimed. "I have the power to extend this battleground a few extra kilometers. It's time for a game of Gormball. Try not to hold it too long, you won't want this one to explode! Hahahahahaa!" Garb unleashed the energy ball on the remaining forces. A wave of utter destruction followed. The battle concluded. Garb, the Grundo leader stood before the obelisk, confident in his victory. "Oracle! I have shown you my strength and we have proven to be the strongest faction. Now, show yourself for the champion, or I will have my army abduct this entire obelisk." The Oracle suddenly appeared through a beam of light. "You have invaded the Tyrannian Battleground and will NOT be granted with a boon. I have seen your fate, Garb! Your relentless greed knows no end. You shall fall at the feet of a Slushie Slinger."

     https://images.neopets.com/randomevents/images/grundo_leader.png

      Outraged, Garb lashes out at the Oracle, hurling stones and punches at the obelisk to no avail. A piercing flash discharged from the tip of the monument and repelled the mutant army. The flash didn't inflict much damage, but it was enough to deter the invaders. The mutant Grundos returned to their spaceship with nothing but the Oracles prophecy in mind. Garb muttered the Oracle's words until it drove him mad. He first directed his army to sack the Slushie Shop on Terror Mountian. They torture the striped Eyrie shopkeeper until he surrendered all of his earnings. Afterwards, the mutants flew their ship to Altador in search of the red Tuskaninny who slings slushies for the Altador Cup. The Grundo leader shook the red Tuskaninny upside-down by the fin. "Hahaha, weaklings! I could never be defeated by a slushie singer. No, wait, it's plushie slinger. Uh, faerie finger?" Garb had already forgotten who he was searching for. Short term memory loss, a symptom of a dim-witted mutant, one could add. "Mmm, yes! That's it! Fruity Faerie Fingers! Time to eat boys. Next stop, VIRTUBURGER!" Distracted by his own growling belly, Garb spared the Tuskaninny's life and marched his army back to the ship, cheering about food as they blasted off towards the best restaurant in space.

      Virtuburger is an arcade/diner where many residents of the Space Station take their children to eat and play a variety of games. The spacecraft took the shape of a Flying Spaceship Burger. This month, Virtuburger promoted the new Usuki Cheeseburger from this year's Usukicon. Exclusive Usukis were also found in every kids meal. Unfortunately, the largest rush in the galaxy was on its way, packed with a crew of grumbling mutant stomachs. That same menacing ship that loomed over the obelisk, was now at the doors of Virtuburger. About a dozen rowdy mutant Grundos stormed through the entrance. A Robo Blumaroo greeted them at the door. "Welcome to Virtuburger, travellers. How may I help you?" The Robo Blumaroo was hit with an unprovoked slug to the nostril. The invaders stepped over the collapsed robot with no regard. They knocked over the Neocola machine, snatched food straight from the paws of young Neopets, and one of them even smashed the Neovision screen because he couldn't figure out how to turn the channel. "That's Enough!" Demanded one fearless red Mynci, standing firm at the rear of the restaurant. So low was the brim of his slushie slinger drinking hat that you couldn't see his eyes. "And who might you be?" Garb questioned. The red Mynci casually sipped from the plastic straw wrapped around his left ear. *Gulp, Gulp, Gulp* The entire restaurant went silent. Even the frightened children stop wailing. "The name is, Leigume. I'm responsible for managing the slushie station." A bell rung in Garbs head. He finally recalled the Oracle's words. "It's him! He's the one the Oracle warned about. Crush that Slushie Slinger! The bulky green mutants all rushed towards Leigume one after the other. With his back to the wall, Leigume kept calm as he waited for them to enter his throwing range. The red Mynci gripped a random cup attached to his slushie carrier belt and hurled it with the rage of a disgruntled Yurble janitor. The cup pelted through the line of Grundos with enough force to counter a ridiculously heavy battle hammer. The mutants toppled over each other like Darigan Dominoes. The slushie ricocheted off the wall, causing the straw to dart out directly into Garb's eye. The Grundo Leader had been in mid-air, but the pain from his eye injury brought him down to the surface. "I can't see, I can't see!" He repeated. Because his upper body was disproportionately larger than his legs, the Grundo Leader had trouble with balance. That same thrown slushie cup was only a few inches from his foot. The leftover liquid slowly covered the tiled floor.

      As Garb continued to panic over his lost eyesight, he eventually slipped over the spilt hazard and shook the entire spacecraft on impact. Having the ability to fly, Garb was never seen on his back. His wings were now crushed under his own massive weight and rendered incapable of flight. The Grundo Leader and his mutant army now lay at the foot of a red Mynci, just as the Oracle foretold. The silence was broken by cheering customers. Word of Garb's fall quickly spread across the Virtupets Space Station. Glorified as the "Mynci Mutant Slayer", many customers travelled to Virtubuger just to visit this courageous red Mynci. "Are you really the Mutant Slayer?", they would ask...

     "Nope, I'm just a Slushie Slinger."

     The End.