White Weewoos don't exist. *shifty eyes* Circulation: 194,305,201 Issue: 758 | 18th day of Storing, Y18
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Article Spies - Fanciful Fauna


by water_park1993

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Scene: Shenkuu. Eleven o'clock in the morning.

Two reporters are walking across a wooden bridges around Shenkuu, in order to find the Fanciful Fauna which is hidden behind bushes and waterfalls. Yes, you guessed correctly; it's indeed Christos and Birdy, our two trouble makers!

Today, they decided to spy onto the beautiful Koi shopkeeper.

Christos: Take care Birdy, don't swing the bridge so vigorously, it might break!

Birdy: *still swinging* But it's so much fun! And it's a long walk to the shop, on the other side of the city; I need something to do to keep me occupied.

Christos: It will take even longer if we fall in the cold waterfall underneath us! And we don't want that, do we?

Birdy: *sighs* I guess not. Well, the fun part is almost over, here is the land again...

Christos: Phew, no more bridges. Only some more hills to climb and get over and...we'll finally get there!

After many hills - up and down - our friends are finally standing outside of the shop. This time their plan is different; they are going to impersonate future buyers of a rare petpet, so that they can excuse their existence for so much time in the shop. As they will be waiting for their rare petpet, they'll be indirectly spying on the shopkeeper. Geniuses, ha?

Christos: *enters the shop* Good morning Madame! This glorious friend and I, are here to restock a rare petpet. Mind if we sit on that cozy sofa until something restocks?

Koi: These Petpets can be found nowhere else in Neopia!

Birdy: We know, that's why we are here!

Koi: Fell free to sit and wait quietly. We restock roughly every 8 minutes or something. *smiles and points to the sofa* I will be right back, I need to eat something! I have been starving these past days...

Christos: Take your time. We will be sitting here - quietly - not spying on anything. *evil grin*

Birdy: Of course, count on that

The reporters sit down on the sofa (well, Christos does. Birdy does a combination of leaping and falling on it, which earned her a glare from the Tomamu that had been sitting on the back of the sofa) and was waiting. A few buyers come and go, and a few wait around, hoping to snag a rare and unusual specimen for their pet, gallery, or to resell.

Birdy soon gets distracted with watching the non-existent grass grow on the bamboo floor, and Christos reviews his notes on whatever is known about the shopkeeper up to know. He dully notes down "Starving". It should lead somewhere, shouldn't it?

In fact, they both get so wrapped up in what they're doing, that they don't even notice when a Quilin struts into the room.

Cue the pandemonium.

Everyone (save Christos and Birdy) make a mad dash for the petpet, each hopeful buyer wanting to be the lucky new owner. There's screaming, biting, kicking, and the petpet isn't doing too well either.

Finally, one person manages to get hold of it, sprints to the counter and slams down the bag of neopoints, shouting out a price.

The Koi declines, naming another price.

The wannabe owner pleads with the shopkeeper, naming a slightly-higher price.

Again the Koi declines.

This goes on for about two more minutes, everyone else still trying to buy the petpet as well. The Koi appears to be quite amused, although it is hard to tell for sure.

Finally, they agree on a price, and the petpet is sold.

A collective "Awww...!" of disappointment spreads throughout the room, and everyone leaves.

The Quilin's new owner is walking on air as they leave, and as soon as they exit the shop and start walking down the lane, the Pant Devil swoops down and...

...steals their Plain Omelette! THE NERVE.

Anyway, back to our reporter-spies. Amazingly, they didn't even notice that a rare petpet had stocked until the shopkeeper spoke to them.

Shopkeeper: Sorry you two missed out on that Quilin. Better luck next time.

The Koi goes back to the storeroom then, presumably to finish her lunch.

Christos: *blinks* A...Quilin? Isn't that one of the most expensive petpets?

Birdy: *nods* I think so. Why?

Christos: ... Didn't you hear what she just said? One stocked - we missed it.

Birdy: ... Oh. So...should we wait around for another petpet to stock so we can spy--

Christos: *clamps hand over Birdy's mouth* Shhh! Don't say that out loud!

Birdy: *removes Christos's hand* Okay, okay! *suddenly grins* I'LL BE VERY SURE NOT TO--

Christos apparently has had enough, grabs one of the pillows on the sofa and stuffs it in Birdy's mouth.

Birdy: Mmph!

Christos: At last, quiet...

Birdy pulls the pillow from her mouth and shoots Christos a wounded look. About fifteen activityless minutes later, a Christmas-coloured Koi pokes his head in the door and looks around. Upon seeing Christos and Birdy on the sofa, he comes inside, dragging a rather large sack behind him.

Mysterious Koi: Hey, is she here?

Christos: Is who here?

Mysterious Koi: My girl, of course! She runs this shop, you know.

Christos: Er...I don't mean to sound rude, but... Who are you?

Birdy: *has been staring at the Koi with wide eyes* Ohmyword you're Mad!

Christos: Now Birdy, I know it's not every day that some Koi walks up to you and asks "is she here", but that's no reason to assume--

Birdy: Nononono! That's Mad! You know, the star of the Neopian Times comic One Fish, Two Fish? *turns to Mad* I AM YOUR BIGGEST FAN CAN I PLEASE HAVE YOUR AUTOGRAPH?!

Mad: *grins* Of course you can! *digs through the sack for a moment, and soon pulls out a slightly-wrinkled piece of paper* Here you go.

Birdy accepts the paper with wide eyes, a delighted expression on her face. After looking it over, she clutches it to herself and cuts loose with an ear-piercing squeal and collapses on the floor, still having the same expression. Christos slowly begins inching away.

Mad: Eh-heh, girls do seem to have that same reaction to me...

A few short moments of silence pass (except for the occasional squeak from Birdy), then Mad speaks again.

Mad: Well, I'd better get going; I have a Neovision interview at two o'clock and there's no way I can afford to miss that. Fame does have its price, you know. Hey, will you make sure sure my girl gets her things, right? *motions to the sack*

Christos: Uh...

Mad: Great! Gotta go now, see ya!

And with that, Mad leaves, leaving Christos with a delirious-with-glee reporter and a large sack filled with who knows what. Judging by the smell coming from the bag, it appears that some chocolate had melted on some roses. Then, oddly enough, a Weewoo clamors out of the bag, flies over to a tree, and begins talking about Mad and nothing but Mad.

Christos: Second thing noted in the notebook: A (supposedly) famous Koi, Mad, brings roses and chocolates to the shopkeeper!

Birdy: *sits bolt upright* I GOT AN AUTOGRAPH!

Christos: That's not the point now, Birdy. Haven't you heard?

At that moment the Shopkeeper comes out of the room, a slight frown on her face.

Koi: Is everything alright out here? I think I heard a scream...

Christos: It was Birdy squealing over an autograph?

Koi: Autograph? From whom?

Birdy: It is an autograph from the most awesome Koi - after you of course! - in the whole of Neopia! *squeals and collapses again*

Christos: She means Mad...

A nearly unreadable expression crosses the Koi's face... A look of confusion, worry, and "Oh-great-not-him-again".

Koi: I... I see... *clears throat and eyes the sack warily*

Meanwhile, Birdy has revived, and the shop becomes cluttered with many shoppers, in front of an empty shelf. They are all waiting for new petpets to restock. There is no more place to sit or stand.

Koi: I should get going to stock more petpets, I can see some angry shoppers over there... *glances from the customers, to the sack, and back again*

Christos: Let me help you with this sack! *smiles evilly*

Birdy: Of course we can help you take this bag inside your room! And see what you are do--

Christos: ...where you eat your lunch?

The two reports move inside the room as the Koi restocks more common, non-rare, out of the ordinary petpets. The shop is lively again with potential buyers shouting different prices again.

As the Koi stocks petpets, Christos and Birdy drag the sack to the room behind the counter. Leaving it in the middle of the floor, Christos begins looking inside the sack.

Birdy: CHRISTOS! What are you doing?!

Christos: Opening the sack! Don't you want to know what's inside? There could be vital information for our article.

Birdy: But it's not ours. *stern glare*

Christos: Well... what would happen if the sack tipped over and some of the stuff fell out? Would we just leave it there?

Birdy: Well... I guess not, but--

At this moment, Christos gives the sack a nudge, and it tips over, some of its contents spilling out. Birdy shoots Christos an annoyed look, but Christos just grins.

Christos: Oops. Well, I guess we get to see what's inside after all!

The reporters begin picking up the things from the floor, quite a few of which are TCG cards. Then they see it. The MSPP TCG Card. Christos' eyes grow large as he reaches for it. But Birdy is faster.

Birdy: WOW! This is one of the rarest cards ever!

Christos: I know! *tries to touch it*

Birdy: Man, is that Koi lucky... *stuffs the MSPP Card back in the sack, then ties it* Well, our work here is done! Let's go, Christos.

Christos: But don't you want to know what else is in the sack?

Birdy: But what if Mad found out we looked in the sack? If Mad found out, he might get mad! And if Mad got mad, he'd tell his owner, then Fish would get mad, and then the mad Mad and mad Fish would form a mad mob of mad Mad fans, and if Mad got REALLY mad, he... he... ... HE MIGHT TAKE BACK HIS AUTOGRAPH! *hyperventilates*

Christos immediately begine to calm Birdy down. Spotting an ornate paper fan laying on the near-by table, he snatches it up, opens it, and begins to fan Birdy and (hopefully) keep her from passing out.

Christos: NONONO. Relax...

Birdy: *forces self to take deep breaths* Okay, I'm good now. Let's go, Christos!

Birdy skips out of the room, and Christos has no choice but to follow her; but not before one last look towards the sack.

The reporters move into the main room. The shop is empty but on the shop shelf there is a...

Christos: Pandaphant! Quick, grab it!

Birdy: But the crowds...

Christos: HURRY!

Birdy and Christos begin pushing through the crowd, or at least trying. They aren't very successful.

Birdy: Hey, I have an idea! I'll create a distraction, then you grab the Pandaphant!

Christos: But--

Christos doesn't get the chance to finish his sentence, for at that moment, Birdy suddenly cries out and collapses on the floor. The shoppers stop and stare at the reporter, and during this brief distraction, Christos snucks over and grabs the Pandaphant. As Christos reaches the counter, Birdy leaps to her feet and runs over to join him.

Christos: 2,000 for this petpet!

Koi: Sorry... too low. How about--

Birdy: *digs through pockets* We'll pay... 5,000 neopoints?

Koi: SOLD! Thank you for buying from us!

Birdy: IT'S OURS! WE GOT IT!

Christos: Finally, we have made some profit!

Birdy: What do you mean? We are keeping this one; it's so cute!

Christos *left to stare* I am sure you are joking, we just made a profit worth more than a million!

Birdy: I say we keep it and we call it...

Christos: Oh, nonono. Once you name it, you start getting attached to it. We're selling it once we get back to Neopia Central.

Birdy: But... It's so cute! See? *holds the Pandaphant in Christos' face* We just can't sell it, Christos! We can't! *on the brink of tears*

Christos groans and slaps his forehead. He knows there's no arguing when Birdy gets emotional.

And so, our friends leave the shop with Birdy hugging the Pandaphant happily, and with Christos ready to cry. At least they learnt some new things today but moreover, Birdy got a petpet!

That's all about our friends' newest adventure, stay tuned for the next, in which they spy on-- Well, you'll find out soon enough.

 
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