A Mother's Love, Then and Now

     I sat at my desk, staring at the paper that had been fed into the typewriter Reuben had brought home from a business trip to Moltara. My fingers were poised over the keys, and I squinted; maybe if I squinted hard enough, I could tease words out from the paper. Of course, that didn’t – and wouldn’t – happen.

     I ran a hand through my mane as I glanced at the flier next to the typewriter. The Meridell Herald was holding a writing contest. It sounded straightforward when you thought about it – simply write a thousand-word story about a mother’s love. Not to mention, I was already a mother. Behind me, next to the bed, was Darel’s cradle, and he was fast asleep. Thank Fyora.

     I love Darel, of course. I love him with all my heart. And once upon a time, I had a mother who loved me as much.

     But I didn’t know how to put that on paper.

     * * *

     My mother was Alyx, a Faerie Lupe. She and my father, Dunstan, were pressed into working for Ramtor, King Skarl’s advisor turned usurper, as agents when he discovered that several resistance fighters and fugitive knights lived in our neighbourhood. They managed to make a deal – my parents would swear loyalty to Ramtor on the condition that I wouldn’t be harmed. As a result, I was granted magic powers that would help me defend myself. For a while, I didn’t have to worry about using them, as my parents kept their end of the deal, as did Ramtor.

     Eventually, the atrocities Ramtor committed during his reign began to bother my mother and father. They felt more and more terrible with each piece of information about the resistance that they passed on and started to play double agent, discreetly sending Ramtor’s enemies far from our village.

     It was a dangerous game, and we paid the price before long.

     One day, Ramtor’s soldiers, all in light blue and gold livery decorated with the stylized moon of his staff, came to our house. Having been warned, my parents hid me away in my bedroom and told me not to come out until it was safe.

     It never became safe.

     Time passed since Alyx and Dunstan had kissed me and whispered “I love you” to me in various words and forms. I would alternate between holding my breath inside my closet and blinking back tears as my worst fears took shape slowly. I resisted the urge to open my closet door, held it just shut enough to let air in, afraid that someone would suddenly wrench it open from my trembling hand. I hoped with all my might that Mom and Dad would come return for me, tell me everything was okay.

     “There she is!”

     The closet door was flung open, and I tumbled out onto my bedroom floor, skinning my knee. A burly Yellow Chomby in chainmail grabbed me by my wrist, and I could see the Faerie Lupe and the Shadow Draik that were my parents, bound in shackles and guarded heavily by a squad of horrible monsters – ghostly Meercas and hulking Wockies.

     “Don’t hurt her!” Dunstan begged. One of the Wockies punched him in the face.

     “She did nothing wrong!” Alyx pleaded. She was knocked down by a spear to the back of her knees.

     “Let her go!”

     “Andrea! Andrea! We’ll come get you – “ A Meerca put his probably clammy hand over her mouth.

     They were dragged away while the Chomby and his partner, a glowing Zafara, took hold of me. I saw a length of rope and a burlap sack, and knew they were meant for me. I craned my neck and strained against the guards, crying for Mom and Dad, reaching out for them as they struggled to also reach for me. I remembered my gift of magic; I searched for it from within me, determined to do something, anything, to save my family. I remembered what it felt like, the day I opened the little chest that one of Ramtor’s wizards gave me, and a blaze of blue light arced its way into my heart…

     I felt something like my own storage chest in my heart finally being unlocked, and I screamed.

     A blast of glowing, sparkling blue threw both the Chomby and the Zafara and their ropes and sack into the wall so hard that the framed pictures and books from my shelves fell onto them as well. I kept on screaming as I ran, looking for my parents in our ransacked house.

     “Mom! Dad!”

     My eyes darted everywhere for fear that more of Ramtor’s guards were lurking in the kitchen, or behind the couch, or under the stairs. But my parents were long gone. Dread filled me and I felt like I was falling slowly into a cold lake, sinking, shivering…yet I was warm, shining with my blue magic, small flames flickering on my fingers.

     I heard a bang. The Chomby and the Zafara had staggered out of my room on the second floor. I didn’t think, I just screamed again, hurling bolts of blue light at them before turning to run. Tears welled up in my eyes, and I didn’t notice the magic ebb away from me as I escaped into the woods, putting as much space between me and the guards after me.

     It would be a while until I realized that I had not seen my parents in my flight – and that I would not see them, ever again.

     * * *

     I found tears streaming down my cheeks as I balled my hands into fists on my lap. My mom – my parents – had made the ultimate sacrifice for me. They probably knew they stood no chance against Ramtor’s forces once he found out about their treachery but were more concerned about keeping me safe. Even the deal they had made…was to protect me, if and when they could not. I looked over at Darel again – a little Red Kyrii, just like his mother.

     A tight claw closed over my heart, as though the open chest inside it was being forced shut. I breathed in and out, blinking away my tears. It had been years since I last saw Mom and Dad alive, years since I mourned them while wandering Meridell with my relatives, but this writing contest had caused those old memories to surface like they were new.

     There was something else, too.

     Could I do what Alyx did many years ago for her daughter? What if Darel was in danger? Would I have the courage to protect him?

     I concentrated on that thought with all my might until my hands glowed blue. In a mirror, I saw my eyes flash, alive with power like the fire in a lantern. But because there was no real danger, it all flickered away, leaving me sighing wearily as I rested my elbow near my typewriter.

     Can I have that kind of courage, like my mother? And my father?

     I stared at the paper in my typewriter again. Something tugged at my mind, perhaps the beginning of a story, but it spun away from me as quickly as it had come. I scrubbed my eyes with a handkerchief I always kept in my pocket and stood up, crossing the room to Darel’s cradle.

     Reaching down to stroke his mane, I observed him as he curled up in one side of the cradle, arms wrapped around a large Mootix plushie. And as I gently touched his face, sensed his breath on my fingers, I felt my heart swell and thought I would cry again.

     “Andrea?”

     Reuben opened the door of our room and saw me beside the cradle instead of at my desk. I smiled sheepishly.

     “How’s the wri – “ The White Blumaroo caught a glimpse of the typewriter and the blank paper in it. “Oh. Writer’s block?”

     “Yes, and…no,” I said, feeling like I had given the worst answer to any question posed to me in my entire life. “I’m on the cusp of figuring out what I want to write, but at the same time, the words aren’t coming out. Nothing feels right, Reuben.”

     “Feels right, huh?” he repeated with a straight face, but with enough emphasis on that word that I had to roll my eyes.

     “I guess I walked right into that one,” I said before he could elaborate further on his pun. I withdrew my hand from Darel and approached him, fingering my handkerchief. “A mother’s love. How am I supposed to write about that?”

     Reuben stared at me like my head had just become a Chokato.

     “You’re a mother now, aren’t you?” he said, putting his strong, callused hands onto my shoulders. “Remember when Darel was born? We were both so happy, we could dance and sing and throw parties every day since then. You were so excited to watch him grow into an amazing, clever Kyrii, amazing just like his dad…” Reuben cleared his throat. “Anyway, you could write about that.”

     “Maybe, but it doesn’t feel…I don’t know, right? Enough?” I twirled a lock of my mane and wondered if I should have braided it for today. I slumped under Reuben’s grasp. “I thought about my mom, Reuben. About how she and Dad gave their lives for me. How they thought of me, to the very end. How brave they were, facing Ramtor…how can I match that, for Darel? I feel like I can’t.”

     My shoulders shook. I knew I was going to cry again. But Reuben wrapped his arms around me and embraced me tightly.

     “Andrea, who tagged along with Rohane to rescue me when I was whisked away to Krawk Island? Who fought pirates with me on the day we promised that we would stay together? Who helped turn back the bandits from Trestin and found her long-lost brother while she was at it? Who was it that did her best to move forward even after her parents were taken from her?” The White Blumaroo pointed to me, at my heart. “You’re already selfless and brave.”

     “But…can I do it, for Darel? And how can I put it on paper?” I gestured to my untouched typewriter. Oh, I was making such good use of Reuben’s gift to me.

     “Of course you can,” he said softly. He pushed away a tuft of my mane away from my forehead. “I know you can do it. Because I’ve seen the courage you have, to fight for your family and friends.”

     I opened my mouth to say something but fell silent. I took a deep breath; I smelled the wood smoke and the tang of metal. No doubt Reuben had come from the forge before entering our room.

     “Reuben, can I ask you something?”

     “You know you can ask me anything.”

     I frowned in thought. “When the day comes that I have to protect Darel the way my parents protected me…will you be there, with me?”

     He met my gaze and chuckled softly. “Do you even have to ask? We set out to start a family together. That includes keeping Darel safe together. I’ve got my own personal armoury and everything.”

     Sniffing, I hugged him right back. “Thank you, Reuben.” Like a fresh breeze blowing into a musty room, I realized that I could protect Darel – and everyone I loved – with all my strength.

     Because I wouldn’t be alone. I had Reuben with me, and many more besides. I wouldn’t let anything happen to Darel, or Reuben, or any of my family or friends. I couldn’t do anything to save my parents except run to live another day – but this time, I could do more. Much more.

     “Reuben, can I ask you something else?”

     “What is it?”

     “Can you leave the room for a while? I need to concentrate and write my idea down quickly before I lose it.”

     The End.