All in Vain

     A hush fell over the crowd of Neopians, huddled around the fire of the dim bookshop. An emerald-coloured Lenny wearing a witch’s hat sat in an airchair, looking up from the old book.

     “And the moral of the story is not to put style over substance!” she said, raising a wing. “Never let vanity get in the way of true beauty!”

     The group of Neopians applauded in the tiny bookshop. Many of them were dressed in festive costumes for the gathering; hats, cloaks and masks.

     “Thank you all for coming to spooky storytime today!” trilled the Lenny. “And remember, the more books you read, the smarter you get! Why, you might even win the Neopian Book Award!”

     “Don’t forget, the Autumn Costume Contest is at the Rainbow Pool at 1:00!” announced the Blue Nimmo who owned the bookstore. “The winner will receive a trophy!”

     The crowd of Neopians murmured excitedly, some showing off their costumes, while others perused the books left in stock.

     A hooded figure stood near the back of the crowd. She drew her cloak around herself and strode out of the shop, but not before overhearing a brief exchange between the bookseller and guest reader.

     “Thank you so much for volunteering to read today! And I must say, your new Halloween paint job looks wonderful!”

     “Hmm, yes…but I’m not so sure I like dark green feathers after all,” said the Lenny, fluttering her lashes, rimmed with makeup. She pulled out a compact mirror, tilting her head. “Maybe in spring I’ll paint myself Pink! Or Rainbow…I can’t decide what would look prettiest!”

     The cloaked figure spit on the ground. A flower curled and darkened into a noxious purple at her feet.

     Outside, several neopets were showing off their outfits, clearly eager to enter the contest. They paid her no mind as she walked by, her wings and tail hardly standing out amongst all the costumes.

     “Mine is the latest from the NC Mall!” giggled a Blumaroo, twirling on her tail to show off a cherry-blossom pink dress and hat. “I have the whole matching set!” She leaned towards the bookshop storefront, clearly trying to catch her reflection in the window.

     “Pfft, anyone can go buy a bunch of capsules!” said a Kyrii, tottering under the weight of a pair of horns braided into her hair. “My gorgeous mane will win!”

     “Well, I made my costume,” began a Bruce in a tattered, burlap sack. “I’m dressed as-”

     “Puh-lease!” snickered the Kyrii. “Where’d you get your Ultra Fashionable Potato Sack? The Rubbish Dump?”

     The Bruce’s pudgy cheeks flushed pink.

     “Why don’t you go over to the Money Tree, maybe you can find something from a Generous NC Mall Shopper!” laughed the Blumaroo.

     The fall leaves crackled and crunched beneath the figure’s heavy boots as she slunk away. Further still, another group of Neopets were talking about the story they had just heard. It was here the figure paused to listen.

     “I wonder what colour she was before she was cursed.”

     “Do you think she turned Grey?”

     “Being Grey doesn’t give you horns and a tail, silly.”

     “Whatever she looked like, can you believe her name?!”

     “Oh I know! Vira? Four letters and it's pronounceable?” sighed a Cybunny. “Oh, I wish I had a name like that!”

     The story had changed over the years. Sometimes she was pretty, other times she was plain. Sometimes she was arrogant, sometimes she was humble.

     Indeed, at this point Vira herself could not even remember if her old fur had been yellow or green.

     Like most myths and fables, the minor details were not as important as the moral.

     Conceit is a curse. Do not be vain. Be careful what you wish for.

     And yet…

     “Cool costume!” said a Silver Kougra, interrupting her thoughts. “Is that the Masala’s Collector’s Hooded Cloak? Or the Spirit of Slumbers Collectors coat?”

     Vira glared at him from under her hood with sunken, red eyes. Usually this worked, but the Kougra was undaunted.

     “Whoa! Those contact lenses are so cool! Would you like to trade? I have a bunch of stuff in my closet I could offer!”

     “Oh, a trade?” she sneered.

     Vira drew a rotting Kougra Lily flower from her cloak with one hand, and chained, green dagger with the other. “I could offer one of these,” she hissed with a smile. “Which would you like?”

     The Kougra scampered off with a yelp; striped tail between his legs. Vira cackled, but her mirth was short lived.

     The hypocrisy of it all made her seethe. What good was a moral about not being vain, when crowed from the beak of a freshly painted Lenny? What was the worth of a fable about inner beauty, while lauding the shiny trophies you could get for reading the most books, or having the best outfit? Don’t be vain, don’t be proud… but get the latest paint job, save your dubloons and codestones for training, and stuff your closet full of clothes.

     Neopia was obsessed with appearances. Be it running to the Rainbow Pool the minute a new colour was dropped, buying up capsules for the newest styles and customisations, or spending hours upon hours at the Mystery Island Training School.

     Pets weren’t even satisfied with their looks or strength anymore. A beautiful pet could be worthless if their name was filled with numbers or underscores.

     The Beauty Contest, Customisation Contests, the Book Awards, the Battledome…all Neopets wanted to be beautiful, strong, intelligent, adored.

     All of these were just pretty words to dress up vanity.

     Her wish had been no different than that of thousands of other Neopets. Every pet wanted to be the best-dressed, the smartest, the strongest, the most beautiful…

     …so why was she the only one who was punished for it?

     She walked past Kauvara’s magic shop and was nearly bowled over by a Quiggle hopping out.

     “I can’t believe it restocked!” he cried, clutching a Green Lutari Morphing Potion.

     Vira snarled, having half a mind to whip the potion from his sticky, webbed hand with her chained dagger, but thought better of it as he hopped off.

     She recalled frantically gulping down Acara morphing potions of any colour, and then morphing potions of any species.

     But no potion had been able to rid her of her horns and tail, no Paint Brush able to paint away her sickly green fur.

     And so her supposed cautionary tale was lost on a self-obsessed world. She was nothing more than another bogeyman in the Gallery of Evil, reduced to a spooky plushie or Halloween costume. Commodified into school supplies or collectables. Don’t be vain, but come to the NC Mall and get your Vira’s Collector Horns! …horns that Vira herself would have done anything to get rid of.

     She stalked by the Pound, its cheery red doors and flower gardens belying the happenings within. Pets and their owners haggled with each other over customs and colours, tokens and trophies, stats and style, how many letters or numbers were in their names…as if Neopets were goods being swapped at the Trading Post.

     Meanwhile, pets without a decent colour or name had essentially been checked into the Fleapit Motel with no check-out date.

     “I don’t want to go back!”

     Vira turned to see a Valentine Ixi being coaxed along by their owner. The Ixi shook her head, planting her pink hooves into the grass.

     “Please, let me stay with you!”

     “We talked about this,” said her owner, not unkindly. “With this new colour, you’ll have a better chance of being adopted!”

     “No!”

     As if on cue, a Woodland Uni pranced out of the Pound, tossing her flowery mane in a flurry of leaves and petals.

     “What an amazing find! Can you believe it?” said the new owner, as if the Uni was an unusually low price found on the Shop Wizard.

     “See? What did I tell you! With that pretty pink fur, you’ll be adopted in no time!” The owner held up a small hand-mirror to the Ixi, who wiped her tears. “Now show anyone who comes in today how nice you look now!”

     Vira snarled, and another pair of flowers curdled purple at her feet.

     The lesson here was crueller than any cursed mirror or toxic flower.

     You will only be wanted if you are beautiful.

     Vira had learned that lesson herself long ago. Some versions of her story remembered she once had friends. She was once loved.

     “You’re more beautiful than any flower I’ve ever seen.”

     “You shine brighter than any star in the sky.”

     But every version left out just what her treacherous wish had meant. If she was the prettiest Acara in Neopia, then she would never want for friends, would never need to compete with other pets for being the loveliest, strongest or smartest. She would always be loved.

     Vira had feared she was only loved for her beauty. The curse had proven her right.

     It played out again before her in the Pound, even now.

     No one will want you if your name is mediocre, your colour plain, or all you have to wear is a potato sack. No one will love you if you are ugly.

     She meandered into the NC Mall. Vira abhorred the place, but the fall festival had promised Candy Pumpkin Lattes, so she begrudgingly skulked inside.

     As usual, the line for Umbra’s Styling Studio was out the door.

     Umbra hadn’t been open even a year and was already sold out nearly every day. Neopets used to be valued based on the age of their colour. UCs, they had been called. Pets of older generations had clothing and fur that newer pets didn’t. They were highly prized, the rarest of the rare, even if their name was bad or their stats were poor.

     But Umbra had cracked the code on how to paint those styles back. And neopets and their owners couldn’t get enough.

     Vira watched a newly painted Royal Aisha run her paws through her long red tresses.

     “How beautiful…” the Aisha whispered into the mirror of Umbra’s parlor.

     Vira already knew that there was no special token that could paint over her ugliness.

     She turned to leave, but caught sight of a Blue Moehog sitting outside of Umbra’s Styling Studio. Tears were running down his snout.

     She walked over and sat next to him, drinking her latte.

     “What’s your deal?” she asked.

     The Moehog sniffed. “Oh, it’s nothing. I…I like your Halloween costume.”

     “I’ve had it for a long time,” said Vira. “You should paint yourself Grey if you want to sit around and cry in the middle of the mall.”

     The Moehog actually laughed at this. “Heh, sorry. I just…ever since Umbra opened, I’ve wanted to go so badly, but I don’t have enough Neocash.”

     “Don’t look at me,” muttered Vira, slurping the whipped cream off her latte.

     “No, that wasn’t what I meant,” chuckled the Moehog. “Everyone just looks so beautiful when they come out of Umbra’s.”

     “Uh-huh.”

     “My name isn’t very good, it has numbers, and I’m just a Moehog,” he sighed, rubbing his hooves. “I’m not pretty like a Xweetok or Uni. Even if I bought a morphing potion, I’d still be a plain colour with a bad name. At last year’s Faerie Festival, I finally got a quest from Naia! But then all her items got too expensive.”

     The Moehog stared longingly into the Styling Studio.

     A Green Lutari, who Vira had a sneaking suspicion had not been a Lutari a mere fifteen minutes ago, was handing a fistfull of Neocash to Umbra. He pointed enthusiastically, almost desperately at the picture of the Faerie Lutari.

     “I wish I could look like that,” the Moehog sighed.

     Now Vira knew there were better plans afoot than poisonous flowers and cursed mirrors, but sometimes Neopets just made it too easy.

     It had been her idea to strike the Grooming Parlour and Clothing Shop first. They were full of mirrors.

     Soon it would all be grey.

     She was helping them, really. Helping them see how ugly their world was.

     She no longer abhorred her curse, if anything, she was grateful. She was the only one who could see how vain, how conceited, how ugly Neopia was.

     “I understand,” she murmured, putting her arm around the Moehog and withdrawing a mirror from within her cloak. “Don’t worry, I can make you beautiful.”

     The End.