Insider Scoop: Queen Fyora's Daily Morning Routine

Howdy, my name is Chaeldar and I run the Neopian Times Tabloids around here. I know what you're thinking, tabloids are always honest and entertaining! And that's all very true. Everything we put in our tabloids is only the truth. We are also an equal opportunity newspaper and employee all species such as Moehogs, Kaus, Aishas, the list goes on. Our Neopets worked hard on the job to secretly follow around Queen Fyora and give you Neopians all the little details of her morning routine. WARNING: Some Faeries are not at all what they claim to be. Without further adieu thank you for the 500 Neopoints and here is what our Neopets have uncovered about Queen Fyora:

Being Faerie Queen

Are you ready for your first exclusive? Every morning Queen Fyora wakes up and reads a book about none other than HERSELF! Yes, you heard this correctly folks of Neopia. Oh, did I say read? I meant someone reads it to her. Allegedly she went down to the Employment Agency in Faerieland and hired somebody. Then, that somebody allegedly sold that information to our tabloids for a mere Neocola and Grub Waffles. Allegedly. Anyways, we all know you could have gone to Kreludor and back if we kept track with how long it's been since you read a book so you better hit the Book Store in Neopia Central if you want to adapt to her routine.

Faerie Queen Smoothie Bowl

As it turns out Queen Fyora is a Faerie that likes to eat before they shower. Unfortunately for us common Neopians, we will never be able to eat this smoothie bowl ourselves because she pays 918,400 Neopoints per day for this breakfast. To me, that says a lot about her being out of touch. Luckily, we saw her private Flotsam chef make it one morning and can give you the exclusive recipe. 4 Dung Berries, 3 Dr. Sloth Socks, errrrrr... Faerie Dust! Yes. Lots of Faerie Dusts. Don't forget the Banana Jubjub Muffins mashed in there. Once again, this is Chaeldar's tabloid giving you these breakthrough exclusives.

Fyora Bath Tub

Next, Fyora obviously takes her showers in her Fyora Bath Tub. Rumour has it she requests a very specific robe. If she does not get the robe, nobody gets a Faerie Quest for the rest of the day. If you've ever gone days on end without a Faerie Quest from her now you know why. Unfortunately, sometimes queens are not all they seem. Maybe you should think twice about supporting Queen Fyora. But what do I know? I'm just an unbiased Neopian who is heavy into journalism. Dr Sloth would not do this if he could give out Faerie Quests. Maybe if Fyora hands over some of her power...

Faerie Queen Perfume

Now it's that time of day for Queen Fyora to smell good. If she did not smell good, who would even want to be around her at that point am I right? There is heavily documented evidence from our source who gave her a whiff during a Faerie Quest that Queen Fyora smells like blossoms and magic. The perfume explains why she looks so ethereal though, it's because it's full of pink and purple glitter. A Starry Grundo once told me that he thinks the glitter particles are filled with poison. I cannot confirm whether or not her glitter is actually poison but I will say I've felt like I've had to go to the Neopian Hospital for migraines shortly after her visiting me begging me to do her quests. Do with that information what you will. I've done a lot of Faerie Quests to help out Fyora and my Neopet has gotten nothing but a level or two. Besides, to me she smells like destruction and unhappiness.

Sloth Rules Poster

Last but not least, Queen Fyora waves goodbye to her I Love Sloth poster on her way out of the door. We have photo evidence of this occurring for several mornings in a row, however, our Grarrl got hungry and like I said we are running an equal opportunity tabloid so it's really not our fault or the Grarrl's. It is what it is you are just going to have to trust us. Why would we lie? From an unbiased perspective, it seems like even she prefers Dr Sloth to rule Faerieland one day. He would make a great ruler, don't you think? As a matter of fact, everyone who bought this tabloid and is reading this right now gets their very own FREE Sloth Rules Poster!!! You can be exactly like Queen Fyora by waving goodbye to this poster every day and pledging your allegiance to Dr. Sloth himself.

That's all the information we have gathered folks, we are not taking any questions about this for our next Neopian Times article. Stay tuned next week for why Krawk Island isn't all it's Krawked up to be. A close insider with Chaeldar's Tabloid Incorporated believes he found cold hard evidence of Dr. Sloth bringing back the Smugglers Cove for us Neopians, and that nobody else from Krawk Island had a hoof or paw in it at all.

!!! IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER !!! We received a generous donation from none other than the genius Dr. Sloth. With the help of his Grundos who reside at the Space Station being most of our sources for this article. In no way, shape, or form was the donation bribery and everything about Queen Fyora is all very much true and from a totally non-biased perspective. Long may Dr. Sloth rule and one day overtake Queen Fyora!