The Best Prank of All

     He recalls his first Masquerade Ball working for King Skarl, where his iconic line came to be: “What do you do if fierce Peophins has eaten too much tin of olives?”, the jester’s confidence soared that day since that simple line was all it took that initial year to have King Skarl cackling but since then the jester has needed to step up his game.

     Last year the jester crashed a disco in the Catacombs, changing the music to the sound of lightning – King Skarl has never liked this modern scene and he secretly enjoys the scared faces of Neopians, so this was a double win. The breaking and entering was not difficult, it is not as-if the Catacombs are well guarded but the use of new-era technology on the sound system was too complex and almost wiped the Court Jester out.

     The year prior, the Court Jester invaded The Kadoatery and turned the mewing Kadoaties into slippery Slorgs – the furry critters are King Skarl’s least favourite Petpets and he was delighted to see them wiped out. He simply cannot stand the constant mewing and begging for food. It took the Court Jester weeks of wandering in Faerieland before he found a Dark Faerie that would be willing to help him. King Skarl loved the prank at the time, but he never brings it up, so it was hardly worth all the effort. Plus, the paperwork and fines he received from the Petpet Protection League was quite the headache and he was not the only one…that Dark Faerie is still out there somewhere cursing his name. Of course, the jester can also never own his own Petpet either, which is a bit of a shame.

     The year before that… well… he skipped into Haunted Woods, stole Sophie’s cauldron and may have accidentally made a new species of Petpetpet. Sophie reversed it right away, but the Court Jester had never seen The Witch so angry! The Blumaroo Court Jester was nervous that King Skarl would be disappointed that the prank dissipated so quickly, but the King thought the fear on the Court Jester’s face was the funniest thing of all. Needless to say, the Blumaroo Court Jester has a lifelong ban from Haunted Woods but this is still King Skarl’s favourite year to reflect on.

     The Blumaroo Court Jester’s favourite prank of all was the year he cursed the young Prince and Princesses to morph into Mortogs until they received true love’s kiss. This curse is also slightly glitched, so actually, the true-loves-kiss thing just resets at midnight NST. The Court Jester was still new to pranking so frankly, this one was all the warty Grundo’s idea. The warty Grundo already had a pond full of Mortogs so the jester thought “Why not?” and went along with his plans. The jester collected the goods the warty Grundo asked for: Macaroni Pencil Boxes, Eye of Mortog, locks of hair… among other things, and managed to coax a witch out of Darigan to conduct the “cursing”. To the Court Jester, that prank is the gift that keeps on giving: seeing Neopians far and wide running to Meridell to kiss these slimy creatures expecting to become royalty and even better when the critters actually blow up in their faces (no Mortogs are harmed of course)! The Court Jester hangs out at the pond often to observe and laugh. At first King Skarl was enraged and almost kicked the Court Jester out of the court, but eventually he thought it was funny too – plus the economic benefits that Kiss the Mortog brings to Meridell is undeniable.

     The jester had a few ideas to make this Masquerade Ball the best one yet, but he was a little late for planning. First, he wanted to capture a local Earth Faerie and make her King Skarl’s own personal Bottled Faerie for the day, but angering Illusen by taking one of her friends probably was not in his best interest.

     He also through about putting a spell on Brightvale – making those academics all think it was the Chocolate Festival. King Skarl would think that was hilarious of course, all those stuffy librarians and wizards thinking something so silly… but their magical wards were powerful and the jester would need to enlist someone from inside of Brightvale castle to break through the spells. It was much too late for that… but still a good idea, so maybe next year.

     The Court Jester also thought about petitioning the locals to do quests for King Skarl, the King would love the power and he would giggle at all the attention. The locals would not enjoy it much, but they did love their king and liked to humor him so they would probably do it. However, time was so limited…he was not sure he could get enough Neopians on board before sunrise to make a big enough impact. Without drones of Neopians almost overwhelming the King with quests, it would not be worth it.

     The Court Jester sighed and started to panic, he had so many ideas but implementation was not his strong suit, he almost always needed assistance and this year he procrastinated a little too long. He paced his room, trying to think of a simple prank: Widgets in a Can, pulling a Snowbunny out of a hat, writing an entire musical based upon King Skarl’s family… all of these seemed too simple and mundane and he was sure King Skarl would not be impressed. Then a lightbulb went off in his brain (something that does not happen often) and the Court Jester giggled to himself. He knew what he would do this year… sure it was a risk but every day with the King was a risk due to that temper of his.

     The Blumaroo Court Jester would simply take the day off. He would not don his colourful costume or noisy hat; he would not even go to the castle on the day of King Skarl’s Masquerade Ball. The jester would just unwind, sleep-in and go about town like a normal Neopian. The Court Jester would not pull any fancy pranks, sing a tune or even tell a joke. He would sit back, relax and enjoy himself, maybe someone else would try to put on a show. King Skarl would be searching far and wide to find where and how the jester did his meddling, but this Masquerade Ball, the Blumaroo Court Jester would have the last laugh … the best prank of all would be to do no prank at all.

     The End.